Fringe Benefits To Getting Fired

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As you well know, UBS is scheduled to begin laying off some 8,000 employees tomorrow, just prior to accepting the “Heart of Gold Award” for community service unrelated to its own employees.* Bloomberg, it seems, is aware of the date as well:

From: [redacted]
Sent: Friday, May 02, 2008 6:41 PM
To: UBS-IBD
Subject: **May 6, 2008**
Dear Bloomberg user at UBS:
As your account manager I am aware of what the date above signifies for some of you. Be aware that Bloomberg will provide you with a free trial should you find yourself in between jobs.
To activate the trial, just call our main number 212 318 2000. If you have any questions or if there is something that I can do for you, let me know.
With regard,
[redacted]

* Apparently the choice of May 6th as D-day had less to do with the Swiss bank’s desire to inject a bit of irony into its firings than wanting to bookend the bad news with parties—see you at that cheesy Mexican restaurant on Vanderbilt across from Grand Central at 5! Management has rented out the place for a whole two hours.

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UBS Chairman: Other Banks Will Have To Fire Thousands Of Employees Too, Y'Know

Difference is, UBS is the only one that's faced facts already, 'cause they're consistently ahead of the curve like that. Credit Suisse, Deutsche Bank, all those other guys will get a cold hard dose of reality sooner or later, though, and when they do they'll say, "Damn! UBS was all over this!" A day after UBS AG announced it was cutting up to 10,000 jobs by 2015, UBS chairman Axel Weber is warning that many of the Swiss banking giant’s rivals may have to follow suit...“I suspect that many banks have not yet really understood what the consequences of the new capital rules for business will be when they come into full effect in 2019,” Weber was quoted as saying in Wednesday’s edition of the German daily Handelsblatt. “We, on the other hand, see this new world very clearly,” he said. “Besides that, Swiss rules commit us to even higher own capital demands than the 10 percent capital quota that Basel III orders.” UBS Chief: Other Banks May Need To Downsize Too [AP] Earlier: Layoffs Watch ’12: UBS Tells Employees Not To Bother Themselves With Figuring Out How To Get Into Work (Ever Again)

Layoffs Watch '12: UBS Tells Employees Not To Bother Themselves With Figuring Out How To Get Into Work (Ever Again)

Earlier this week, before a natural disaster struck the East Coast, UBS announced that it would essentially be getting out of the investment banking business and focusing its energy on wealth management, letting go of approximately 10,000 employees as it transitioned back to its tax evading roots. That was Monday morning, and while the bank had said that it planned to start cuts on Tuesday, most people assumed that the Swiss would wait at least 24 hours between the time Connecticut Governor Dannel Malloy told residents to seek safety from the storm on their roofs, or power for the many who lost it was restored, to can a bunch of staff. Those people, however, thought wrong. Apparently when UBS decides to do something, neither wind nor rain nor is gonna stop them.

Hiring Watch '12: UBS Was Just Joking When It Fired Scores Of Employees In The Harshest Ways Imaginable

Remember last week when UBS called New York based employees the day after Hurricane Sandy to tell them they no longer had a job, and communicated the same news to London-based staff by deactivating their ID cards and cutting off their email access? The bank is hoping everyone is at the point where they can laugh about all that, as apparently management got a bit overzealous with its firings-- these things happen in the heat of the moment-- and actually let go of a few too many people, who are now being offered their jobs back. UBS has brought back several employees who were put on leave when it unveiled a drastic pullback from fixed income last week, and more could follow, sources familiar with the situation said. The Swiss bank stopped dozens of traders from reaching their desks in London last Tuesday, when it unveiled an exit from most of its rates and bond trading businesses in a strategic overhaul that will lead to 10,000 global layoffs. The bankers were placed on special leave until further notice, while in the United States UBS fired several fixed-income employees by phone. UBS has already brought back a small handful of employees who were on leave, two people familiar with the matter said. It could also ask more to return or rehire some where needed, said three other sources, including UBS insiders, adding that some desks were now too thinly staffed to operate properly, if they were desks the bank ultimately wanted to keep going. No hard feelings? UBS takes back some traders on leave amid overhaul [Reuters] Earlier: UBS Takes Swift Action On Job Cuts; Layoffs Watch ’12: UBS Tells Employees Not To Bother Themselves With Figuring Out How To Get Into Work (Ever Again)