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Putting Your Interns To Work

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It gives me no pleasure to inform you that at 8 am this morning, Anthony G, the Hungry Barbarian, completed his Hamptons Challenge (one week in his Hamptons backyard during which he could not buy or be given food, and was only allowed to ingest what he caught with his own two hands). I'm upset about this because 1. I lost $20 and 2. He didn't eat anything "weird," like an armadillo or a domesticated cat or a low flying egret. Nevertheless, congratulations, Tony. To the rest of you--let's start stepping things up. The oysters and the vending machine contest were good but we've got a whole summer ahead of us and, gainfully employed or not, loads of time on all of our hands. I want you all to start submitting ideas now. Quants--you're weird and out of the box thinkers. Get creative. Traders--you're dumb and known for vulgar habits. Base your challenges on sheer volume alone.