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Tell Lehman How To Fix This Thing

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UBS analyst Glenn Schorr laid out today what he thinks are Lehman's only options for survival. According to Glenn, LEH must (choose one): Offload a "sizable slug" of its risk assets to a distressed buyer, sell Neuberger Berman, sell the firm outright, go private, enter a strategic partnership with a "credible partner," or buy back its shares. Unfortunately, due to time constraints and room on the page, Schorr left out a few other ideas he has in mind for the firm, which we'll include now so that we (us and LEH) can make the most informed decision possible. Our vote is for choice B, but you decide what you think is best, let us know, and we'll forward the tally, plus notes, on to Dick:
a.Invite David Einhorn to join the board, handcuff him to his chair, and gloat that he is "now going down with this ship" (in this scenario, Fuld and his Eyebrow play the obvious villain, getting up into Einhorny's face, menacingly hovering and whispering, "You had to keep digging, didn't you, didn't you, you meddling little bastard.")
b.Short Lehman in the prime brokerage accounts of certain hedge funds, collect the winnings and then blame said evil short sellers for the inevitable fall to zero.
c.Keep your feet on the ground and reach for the stars and know in your heart that Lehman is going to make this thing work.*
d. Your Brilliant Plan.
Lehman Has Options, Albeit Costly Ones [UBS]
*Obviously a joke, so please just choose among A, B, and D.


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