DealBreaker Seized! Writer Dedicates Posts to Oppressed Journalists! Things Get Weirder! Lots of Exclamations Used!

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John Carney is on his way back to Manhattan from Iowa, where he was trying to put a stop to this ethanol business once and for all. Meanwhile, Bess Levin is on a beach somewhere ready to shank anyone who comes between her and her margaritas (though she will in and out of here today/some days this week). And, since it's August, you're probably not reading this anyway. However, the show must go on and, after they downed several shots of whiskey, I was asked by the powers that be to help myself to Carney's computer and am now in control here at DealBreaker HQ. Not that it was such a hard gig to get. In fact, when I walked in the office, the only thing close to anyone giving me trouble was when the Fashionista kids stopped me, looked at what I was wearing, and silently judged me before returning to their work making the world safe from the dangers of Armani Exchange purchasers.
So, who am I? My name is Lawrence Lewitinn and I'll be your guest editor here at DealBreaker until Carney chases me out of the office.
At first, I was going to do something silly, like dedicate all my posts to two journalists who currently suffer under an oppressive regime, risking their lives on a daily basis to report the truth in the most dangerous work environment known to mankind while the world instead pays attention to the conflict of two superpowers. Of course, I'm talking about Rebecca Jarvis and Margaret Brennan at CNBC. However, though my newly vested powers allow me to publish whatever I feel like publishing, I'll try to keep it as professional as possible. That said, Becky and Maggie, if you're reading this, feel free to drop Carney a line on how to get in touch with me and I'll be glad to meet up with either one -- or both -- of you at the Royal Cliffs Diner.
As for the rest of you, you can email your complaints to Carney as well.

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Housekeeping: Dealbreaker Is Looking For Columnists

Do you want to write things on Dealbreaker? We are looking for a few more regular columnists to write regularly on the areas of their expertise and interest. Topics could include private equity, hedge funds, b-school, stripping one’s way through b-school, or something that has absolutely nothing to do with any of those things but which you are particularly passionate about. Topics like "what I am thinking about this week" or "finance!" will probably be less successful. If you are interested, and can commit to writing a column each week or so, please get in touch and tell us who you are (a resume if you want, or just what you do) and what you'd like to write about. A sample post on your idea would also be great. As always, if you are currently gainfully employed on Wall Street (and would like to stay that way) for a firm that would not look favorably on a part-time writing career, anonymous/pseudonymous columns are fine.

Housekeeping: Dealbreaker Is Hiring More Columnists

Do you want to write things on Dealbreaker? We are looking for one or more people to join our current stable of columnists to write stuff on Dealbreaker. Topics could include private equity, hedge funds, b-school, stripping one’s way through b-school, or something that has absolutely nothing to do with any of those things but which you are particularly passionate about. If you’re interested, get in touch and let us know your background and what you’d be interested in writing about. If you are currently gainfully employed on Wall Street (and would like to stay that way) for a firm that would not look favorably on a part-time writing career, anonymous/pseudonymous columns are fine.