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We Can Be Bought


As mentioned yesterday in Write-Offs, activist investor Carl Icahn has hired Reuters reporter Dane Hamilton to write for his blog, The Icahn Report. Hamilton was at the newswire for seven years, primarily writing about alternative investments and no doubt made a name for himself covering the Destroyer of all Worlds v. Innocent Little Website case in April 2007. So, congratulations to Dane. And thank you for opening the door for Carney and I to put something out there that we've been thinking about for a while: we can and would like to be bought. I'm not talking about a sale of DealBreaker or the Breaking Media* network of sites. I'm talking about the sale of myself and Carnoi, to some billionaire or otherwise notable person interested in starting a blog and looking for an Irish man or Jewish girl to spice up the agenda with interest rate commentary and many instances and derivatives of the word 'fuck,' respectively.
While Carney and I are technically in a relationship with Dealbreaker, the following are individuals we'd be more than willing, nay dying, to leave this hellish Siberia of financial journalism for; think of them as our Lists. If you see your name below, PLEASE GET IN TOUCH, at least to just get a dialogue going. I promise you, this will be a win-win situation, for all involved.
***Note: The following are in no particular order.***
Carney's List:
-- Steve Schwarzman
-- Warren Buffett
-- (Former SEC commissioner) Paul Atkins (direct quote: "I would do anything for Paul Atkins.")
Bess's List
-- Bill Ackman (/really any members of Team Black Magic)
-- Jim Simons
-- (I'm 150% serious about this post and, realistically, there's no way Goldman will allow him to maintain a blog but I can't in good conscience leave him off:) Snarf Blankfein
-- Ping Jiang
*That's our new name, apparently. No more Dead Horse. Tell your friends.