Bald, Beard, And Baird: Another Press Conference

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Bald whose actual statement you can read here:
8:45: We've "felt the effects of a frozen financial system."
"Americans [are] losing confidence in our economy. This is unacceptable."
Again with the tools and the tool box: "Congress gave us new tools."
"We didn't want to do this."
"The Treasury will purchase equity stakes in a wide variety in banks and thrifts. This is objectionable to a lot of people, me included."
8:49: "We must make capital available on attractive terms." Beard will be deliver the money personally, in a French maid outfit.
"Treasury will make $250 billion available from the $700 billion in the form of preferred stock."
We knew this, but still upsetting: "No More Golden Parachutes."
Participating banks are expected to step it up.
"Our financial institutions must not hoard this money BUT DEPLOY IT." Drop it out of a helicopter, shoot it out one of those guns that shoot tee-shirts ate sporting events, whatever, just put it out there.
9 HEALTHY institutions have already signed up for this kick-ass plan.
8:50: Beard and Baird are going to talk, and the combination of our actions will make the United States the best company in the world, bar none.
"We are acting with UNPRECEDENTED speed, taking UNPRECEDENTED measures."
Beard: "We will not stand down until we achieve our goals."
We've tried to fix this over the last few years. That plan didn't pan out.
History has taught us that we are usually a few steps late to the game. As you know, I am a student of the Great Depression. Been readin' texts.
"I find it heartening that we are not seeing just a national, but a global response."
"As with all crises, the root of the problem is a lack of confidence." The voluntary program is going to win back your trust.
"I'm not suggesting this'll be easy...but we can back to a healthy, vigorous growth."
Chair Bair(d): "All of us are prepared to do whatever it takes." Cool, just do it already.
We weren't going do anything, but then our friends abroad did, and we would've looked bad if didn't.
The FDIC guaranteed a new liquidity program. which is voluntary (but please, sign up, don't make me look bad). The ability to get into this shit expires June 2009.
"We're addressing a lack of confidence."
"The FDIC is strong."

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