Morning Reading


The Senate is set to vote on the American Freedom and Anti Terrorism and Defense Of Marriage Finance Act (AKA All Your Shitty Mortgages Are Belong to Us Act, AKA Save A Dolphin With AIDS Act) tonight at 7:30 pm. Because at least a handful are currently in temple,* and were yesterday as well, they may not have time to give the package a once over. We've enclosed it below so that they can pull it up on their Blackberrys and skim at this time. Or they can just pass it without review. Whichever.
Bailoutbill [PDF]
*My family belongs to the same house o' worship as Sen. Lautenberg (D-NJ), who gives a speech every year and presumably did the same this time around, but I missed it 'cause of this thing. Odds are he name-checked Dick Fuld.


Goldman Sachs Makes 266 People's Mornings

Unlike the life-changing partnership ritual that takes place every two years, the managing director promotions, announced today, are more of a light pat on the ass that says, you’re doing a pretty okay job so far, but don’t get cocky. You've graduated from VP (a title which is now, amazingly, described to the layman as "the level attained by the disgruntled former employee Greg Smith"), and that's something to be proud of, but stay hungry for the reach-around.