Some of you might have noticed that Goldman Sachs has been taking been taking a bit of a hit this morning. Last week there was vague talk about going private by people who don't speak for the firm. Today, Charlie Gasparino reports that senior executives at Goldman have told him "that is not in the cards at least right now." So, uh, ok, when you put it that way! Other things not in the cards for right this second but totally possible in the next five include a merger with a now desperate Vikram Pandit, a holiday party, and the stock going to $1.05.