Vikram Pandit's Got "One More Screw Up" Left. What Will It Be?


"Nothing is happening just yet. One more screw up and he is definitely gone. Based on what I'm hearing, it's fluid. Does this mean Pandit's out? Probably not, but maybe so. He's got like half a mistake left. Unless the board gives him more leeway. I don't know; I'm not in the board meetings." -- Charlie Gasparino, CNBC, 11/25/08

Chaz is right, you know. The only question is, what will the the career (at Citi) ending fuck up be? The sources I'm talking to have mentioned four possible scenarios. The situation is fluid but what they're telling me thus far is that it'll be one of the following:
A. Vikram gets wasted and confesses to Meredith Whitney that C's balance sheet is "completely made up." Follows up with a drunk email (from his work account, natch), that Gary Crittenden "selects random bar code numbers in place of the true horror story that will soon engulf this cesspool and consign it to the scrap heap of corporate history."
B. Not knowing it's verboten, VP is caught using Bob Rubin's private bathroom.
C. Not knowing it's frowned upon, VP engages in sexual intercourse with the cleaning woman on his desk. Pleads ignorance, but it's too late.
D. Truly accidentally but unacceptably nonetheless, Mr. Pandit accidentally grazes Prince Alwalweed's favorite wife's left breast.


Vikram Pandit Is Committed To Getting Paid

If you didn't know Chief Executive Officer Vikram Pandit, you might think he enjoyed not being compensated for the work he does at Citigroup because for quite some time, he wasn't. And although the "I will only get paid $1/year until Citi turns a profit" exercise was fun for a while, he was pretty happy when the old jalopy started making money again, in part because it meant he could receive a paycheck. Then last April, his shareholders rejected the bank's executive pay plan, claiming the Big C "lets Chief Executive Officer Vikram Pandit collect millions of dollars in rewards too easily." And while it's possible that Citi shareholders are just a bunch of pricks who chose to overlook the fact that Uncle Vikula didn't collect squat for several years and once had an entire article written about the fact that lieutenants attributed a "new bounce in his step" to him daydreaming "the day when he is going to earn more than a $1 a year,” maybe they just assume that he doesn't care about getting paid either way? Anyway, here's Vickles, reminding anyone who forgot about the sacrifices he made and setting the record straight: “The board has this process with them, they’re going through it, and they are committed, as I am, to making sure that they resolve this,” Pandit said. “I want to get paid what the board thinks is right for me, for the job that I’ve done and for the incentives that they think I ought to have.” Pandit told lawmakers in 2009 that he would take a $1 annual salary until he restored the bank to profitability. Citigroup made a $21.7 billion profit for 2011 and 2010 combined, compared with a $29.3 billion loss for the two preceding years. “When the company was losing money, I stepped up and said I’ll take a dollar a year and I did, exactly for that reason, exactly the right thing to do,” Pandit said. For those having trouble separating the nice guy/don't want to offend anyone statement from what he's actually trying to say, a rough translation of the above would be: get me paid, bitch! Citigroup Will Resolve CEO Pay By End Of Year, Pandit Says [Bloomberg]

Vikram Pandit Printing Up New Business Cards

Uncle Vickles is back in the game.