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Breaking News: CNBC reports that Bernie Madoff, due downtown this afternoon, has moved his car to the service entrance

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And during the break, the Power Lunch gang narrated us through even more:
"He's gotten off the couch. He's walking toward the kitchen, no, no, the bathroom. He's in the bathroom. It looks like, maybe, oh, nope, he's not gonna shut the door. He's unzipping his pants. He's whipping it out. He's not even cut! Fraud! Fraud! [compose themselves] He's taking a leak [Kneale interjects that it appears as though Berns is dehydrated]. He's zipping back up. He's, whoa, he's leaving the toilet seat up! Ruth's gonna be pissed, they've talked about this before. He's leaving the room. HE DIDN'T WASH! That's a health code violation right there. This man can't be trusted."