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Steve Jobs Sets The Record Straight

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And I bet all the AAPL Sheeple believe it! Personally, with all due respect to Jobs, I suspect the mock turtleneck is being pulled over our eyes. "Hormone imbalance"? Please. Sorry, not buying it. I don't know how we're being lied to-- he may not actually be dying, and in fact "hormone imbalance" sounds very pre-op, voluntary, and the first step toward Stephanie Jobs-- but we're not yet convinced this is the full story. As an aside, it's heartening to see the Apple CEO is still feeling himself, as evidence by the last line of the following letter, which strikes the typical Jobsish dismissive tone. Take comfort in that.

Dear Apple Community,
For the first time in a decade, I'm getting to spend the holiday season with my family, rather than intensely preparing for a Macworld keynote.
Unfortunately, my decision to have Phil deliver the Macworld keynote set off another flurry of rumors about my health, with some even publishing stories of me on my deathbed.

I've decided to share something very personal with the Apple community so that we can all relax and enjoy the show tomorrow.
As many of you know, I have been losing weight throughout 2008. The reason has been a mystery to me and my doctors. A few weeks ago, I decided that getting to the root cause of this and reversing it needed to become my #1 priority.
Fortunately, after further testing, my doctors think they have found the cause -- a hormone imbalance that has been "robbing" me of the proteins my body needs to be healthy. Sophisticated blood tests have confirmed this diagnosis.
The remedy for this nutritional problem is relatively simple and straightforward, and I've already begun treatment. But, just like I didn't lose this much weight and body mass in a week or a month, my doctors expect it will take me until late this Spring to regain it. I will continue as Apple's CEO during my recovery.
I have given more than my all to Apple for the past 11 years now. I will be the first one to step up and tell our Board of Directors if I can no longer continue to fulfill my duties as Apple's CEO. I hope the Apple community will support me in my recovery and know that I will always put what is best for Apple first.
So now I've said more than I wanted to say, and all that I am going to say, about this.

Apple CEO Letter [Earth Times via PRNewswire]