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Oh, man. Being a parent is tough, huh? Constantly worrying about drugs and drinking, and your kids getting caught up with the wrong crowd and all that. And then there's TV and film. You can't flip a channel without contracting an STD from some MTV trollop, am I right? And it's like, you don't want to be constantly monitoring what they're watching but sometimes you have to! And it's not like you're not going to make mistakes, of course you're going to make mistakes, everyone makes mistakes. Some are dumber than others, of course, and some are entirely avoidable and will make you look like a straight up idiot but whatever, honestly I'm a parent, I never said I was perfect, I'm just a human being like everyone else. That's all I am. A government lovin', prostie bangin' human.

ELIOT Spitzer might want to read movie reviews more carefully. The disgraced governor and former Client No. 9 took one of his daughters to see "State of Play" last Friday at 7 p.m. at the AMC Loews 72nd Street East -- maybe not realizing the film stars Russell Crowe as a reporter and Ben Affleck as a congressman caught having an affair with an attractive young woman. "[Affleck] actually holds a press conference standing there with his wife -- just like Spitzer," said one audience member.

Wrong Picture [NYP]