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Workplace Tip: Keep Your Rage Impotent

Do you ever get the urge to just knock the lights out of one of your colleagues because, I don't know, he watches Two and a Half Men and insists on telling you about it, or he's constantly on the phone during business hours with his significant other, who he calls "shmoopie," or because you just straight up don't like the look on his face? We feel you. But don't do it, otherwise your name's gonna get put in a file and flagged as "crazy" and/or "dangerous," with a note to keep an eye on your ass lest you lose it again. Plus, you'll probably be forced take a course with other "dysfunctional employees" on managing your emotions and that'll be six hours you'll never get back. And if you think getting laid off is a free pass to take out some rage on whoever fired you, or the random colleagues whose asses you've just been waiting to beat down (and figured that on your way out of the building for the last time would be the perfect moment) think again! Your employer will probably have you followed to make sure you don't flip out on anyone again (probably out of fear they could be in some way implicated). On the off chance you've already gone down the path of workplace violence (big and small), share your story! You know we're always into that shit.
Recession fuels worries of workplace violence [Reuters via Cityfile]