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If Jim Cramer Weren't Such A Gentleman, Such A Paragon Of Virtue, He Would've Broken Jon Stewart's Face On TV, Says Jim Cramer

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A lot people have apparently been asking Jim Cramer why, instead of defending himself on the Daily Show, he just rolled over and took whatever Jon Stewart was giving. The answer, Cramer says in an upcoming issue of Time, is that he was "trying to defend our network and take the highroad." But if you think JC didn't want to go circus freak crazy on Stewart, you think wrong! Every fiber of his being was screaming "beat this bitch's ass, you know you want to, just do it. Do it like you do on Mad Money. Do it like you and Spitzer used to in the good old days. Just wail on him." But no! Cramer held it together and exhibited a level of restraint so foreign to his own identity that even Little Jim was recoiling in disgust. Oh, but that Stewart guy will get what's coming to him, believe you me. He'll get his due. Just watch, it'll happen. If not on set or in his office then in the xerox room or the little conference room near to the kitchen. It will happen. And, as hinted above, it might happen with a rolling pin, and it might happen with Martha, either merely in tow or doing all the actual pounding herself. Just wait.

"I tried not to take it personally, but it was so vicious," Cramer tells Time magazine, out tomorrow. "The ultimate takeaway from the evening was, Jim, why didn't you defend yourself? And the answer is, I was trying to defend our network and take a high road and I didn't want to hit him with a chair or break his face or something like that. But he was very vicious. One day he'll answer for it."

He Seethes [Page Six]