Strap On The Singlets, My Friends!

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Cause it's John Thain's 53rd birthday and he's going to have a round on the mat with each and every one of you! No, just kidding! Only Ken Lewis! And on that dead serious note: we can think of no better gift than for one of you (or us, though we're not big on heavy lifting) to go on a manhunt this afternoon to find Boone's boy and transport him up north to Thain's office in Westchester for a little visit, per the birthday boy's request (exact words: "Bring me the head of Ken Lewis"). In the event we're unable to locate KL, who's likely reading this right now* and is about to get himself a head start, other ideas for thoughtful donations that we think would be much appreciated by J to the T include: a new beekeeping suit, the collector's edition DVD of My Girl, some sort of diamond encrusted commode, and/or a job (though, we're told, he's apparently been "talking" with some fund managers and might not need it, so to be safe go with the toilet).
*On an iPhone, naturally, as BAC employees were blocked from reading this here site several months back.

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