Charlie Gasparino Explains The Moisture On His Upper Lip

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The FTprofiles Charlie Gasparino today, and while most of the anecdotes in the piece will be familiar to the Dealbreaker audience (the "What have you got" incident, this fight with Dennis Kneale, the time CG told Lance Armstrong to have a "shitty fucking dinner," San Pietro, San Pietro, San Pietro, his dad was an iron worker, he and Felix Salmon aren't on the best of terms, the biggest regret of his life was not participating in the Golden Gloves contest, and watching his sparring partner make it to the semi-finals was extremely painful) we do finally get an answer to a question that has plagued many of you. It hasn't been an issue recently, but remember those (harrowing) occasions when CG would appear on-air with an extremely distracting glistening on his upper lip? Was it the residue of a glazed donut? Bad lighting? The combination of a few too many cocktails at Tropix and a busted AC unit? Now we know.

Gasparino did not take easily to the demands of television. He recalls one early appearance when he had been out drinking the night before and arrived at the New York studio on a summer morning with a hangover, to find that the air conditioning was not yet on. "I went on air and I did my hit and I thought I did it really well, but I noticed a pool of sweat here on my lip. I guess I was half detoxing and half reacting to the fact that there was no AC. Then my phone rings and it was Claudine, [CNBC president] Mark Hoffman's secretary. She says: 'Can you please hold for Mark?' And I was, 'Oh God, what did I do?'
"He says: 'Hey Charlie, how are you doing? You're doing a great job, but I need to ask you a question.' I said: 'What's that?' He said: 'Have you ever seen the Nixon-Kennedy debates?' I said: 'Yeah.' He says: 'Well, you're not Kennedy. Get some make-up! What are they doing over there? Don't they have any powder?'"

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Cigars 'n' Such: The Secrets To Charlie Gasparino's Success

Some people are such founts of generosity that on their birthday, they think not of themselves and what they will receive, but rather of how they can brighten the days of others. Charles Gasparino is one such selfless, gallant human being. On this special day, January 28th, the 50th anniversary of his entrance into the world, Mr. Gasparino has chosen to present us with a priceless gift: the secrets of his success. Print them out, mark them up, use them to advance your own cause, or simply give thanks to the god of journalism for his magnanimous spirit.