Write-Offs: 08.21.09

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$$$ Sunbathe topless on Bernie's boat. [WH]
$$$Cerberus Investors Exit Funds [WSJ]
$$$ Buy the Dow Jones Industrial Average [WSJ]
$$$Bankers Craving Bonuses Fudge Loan-Loss Reality [Bloomberg]
$$$Job of the Week: BlackRock needs someone to deal with the SEC. You. [DB Career Center]
$$$ Ex-Wives and Others Eagerly Await the UBS Tax-Cheater List [Time]
$$$Cody Willard coming to a big screen near you. [mediabistro]