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Attention Failed Senior Executives

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Many of you-- Dick, Jimmy, the Thain-meister-- have been out of work for a year or more now. Some of you are going to stay that way! Others may have a small prayer. In the spirit of true sisterhood, Duff McDonald called up some financial services recruiters and asked them to give it to us straight re: who has a chance at one day making it into the big boy office again and who will be shuffling down the sidewalk in his bathrobe. Hank Paulson, in their professional opinion, will definitely land a new gig, possibly as a CEO, because his "reputation as a manager is strong" and he could brush off any objections people had to his work with the gov as a blip. Worst comes to worst he could threaten to put Ken Lewis in a body bag again and take over at Bank of America. Dick Fuld has "no shot at another job, ever" because he was mean to people and eats with his hands. Jimmy Cayne, they believe, "should and will stay retired," but that's not because he couldn't get a job, it's because he prefers the Big Daddy JC version of fantasy camp (little bridge, little weed, lotsa Funyions) to the 9-5 thing. John Thain "was an attractive candidate to be a CEO of a significant company until about a year ago," i.e. ToiletGate so Citi it is! And if you thought "head of AIG-FP" was a dealbreaker, ladies, think again! While it will be a challenging for Joe Cassano to land a deal, it's not out the question.