Dick Fuld Wants His Haters To Line Up, So He Can Give Them A Hug, Except For A Select Few, Who He'll Burn Alive

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Seriously, do it. And if you have something to say, say it. Say whatever you want. DO IT. He can take it. In the old days, and until pretty recently, in fact, this would've been an invitation to have your face ripped off. But this is a new Dick Fuld! And he's not mad at you. He's not mad at anyone. He's worked through his issues and evolved. But you, you're not there yet. And since you need someone to put your shit on, Dick has graciously decided to offer himself up. He told a bunch of Reuters reporters all this after they stalked him outside his home in Ketchum, Idaho.

"You know what? The anniversary's coming up," he said. "I've been pummeled, I've been dumped on, and it's all going to happen again. I can handle it. You know what, let them line up. They're looking for someone to dump on right now, and that's me," Fuld lamented and later added: "You know what they say? 'This too shall pass.'"

He actually stitched that last one on a quilt, which is something he's been doing in the downtime. Still scared this is a trap? Don't be! Seriously, he's out of the anger stage and into the phallic one (or is it the oral? Dick isn't sure, it's been a pretty long time since Psych 101. Just go with it).

"You, know Freud in his lifetime was challenged, but you know what he always said, 'You know what, my mother loves me.' And you know what, my family loves me and I've got a few close friends who understand what happened and that's all I need," he said when I asked him how he was holding up.


I mean...yeah...there are some people-- Lawrence McCarthy-- who probably won't get a super warm reception from The Gorilla.

Lawrence McCarthy, who was head of distressed bond trading at Lehman and works for Rafferty Capital now, told Reuters he quit after warning, several times, that the real estate market was living on borrowed time and that Lehman was becoming too leveraged. "Other than six or seven people, no one really knew him. It was like he was in his own world on the 31st floor," McCarthy said of Fuld. "He was never in touch with the troops. In my four years there, he never came down to the trading floor. Not once."

Larry will probably get a hug, like reporter Clare Baldwin, but it won't be a "warm" embrace so much as Fuld wrapping his arms around the guy-- and anyone else who's thinking about crossing Big D-- and crushing him with his bare hands.

At his house in Ketchum, Fuld bristled at the perception. "What, do people think I'm an idiot, that suddenly I woke up two months before and suddenly things were a problem? No. No, the signs were there," he said. "You know, 'Dick never left his office.' Well, I left my office, I left my office plenty."

But other than that, he's good! He's calm. He's fine. And he knows that his enemies will die in a fire, and he and the other misunderstood heroes of Wall Street- Jimmy, Stan, etc-- will rise again.

"I'm not a defeatist," he said. "I do believe at the end of the day that the good guys do win. I do believe that."

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Lehman Brothers Thought Fight To Stay Alive Was A Battle Of Good (Them) Versus Evil (Everyone Else)

As some of you may recall, a month after Lehman Brothers went under, the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform released an interesting email Dick Fuld had sent to LEH vice-chairman Thomas Russo on Saturday, April 12, 2008, circa midnight. Dick had just come back from a dinner with Hank Paulson and was so excited to relay the details he couldn't wait 'til the next day to get in touch with Russo, who he apparently viewed as his "teacher." Fuld said his key "takeaways" were that the government loved Lehman, that Paulson wanted to "kill the bad hedge funds" (like those diabolical shorts Fuld knew were to blame for his problems), and that while the then Treasury Secretary appeared to have a "worried view" of Merrill Lynch, Dick got the sense that Paulson thought Lehman was in terrific shape. Per the bankruptcy documents put online last week, here's how the rest of the conversation between Fuld and his Sensei went.