Skip to main content

Would You Spend Your Bonus On This Bed?

  • Author:
  • Updated:

The hideous eyesore you see above isn't just a bed, it's a sleeping experience. It's called the "Sphere" and it will run you about $50,000. I know, sounds kind of steep to pay for a mattress that doesn't spontaneously blow you the moment you get in but guess what, this baby also comes bunch of other shit you probably already own, like an iPod dock and flat screen TV, and having it all in the bed will make you feel like a man (as will the cooler for drinks and the sweat-wicking system). The Journalreports manufacturers are hoping there's a market out there for guys looking to throw down a bunch of money for sleep stations like the Sphere, which are centered around the idea of "macho mattresses" containing "muscle-recovery properties" and cooling technology (based on the theory that men are more likely to feel hot in bed than women) and then fully-loaded with special add-ons like a safe to hold your gun and other manly stuff. To that end, there's this:

Luxury auto brand Lamborghini, which is owned by Volkswagen AG, has teamed up with Italian mattress maker Magniflex SpA to design a mattress aimed at men who love sports cars.

God, is there anything that makes you feel more like a man than laying down at night and dreaming about (sucking) tailpipe? One thing I'm troubled by is that the "Lamborghini bed" is really just this:

A regular bed with the logo slapped on. Which strikes me as a rip. Why not just buy one of these (which would actually probably get you a little more respect from the ladies, provided you own it) and call it a day? Anygay, thoughts?