Allen Stanford Suffers Another Blow, George Soros Not So Much

Author:
Publish date:
Updated on

This one didn't come at the hands of a fellow inmate but everyone on the inside would be wise to stay out of Sir Stan's way to today, as odds are he is in a mood. One word-- and I mean one!-- and you're gonna get punched in the mouth. We knew this was coming but no one could've prepared us for what it would feel like to see that Stanford, officially, was not named one of the Forbes 400. The incarcerated Ponzier told ABC in April that what's been so upsetting to him through this entire ordeal of being accused of fraud is not the going to prison part (it's actually not that bad), not the dragging of his name through the mud, and not the loss of his investors' trust. What really chafes-- and what brought him to tears at the time and probably still now-- is that the actions taken by the SEC "deprived" him of being publicly recognized as one of the richest guys in the world. So what you can do right now, Mary Schapiro, is go to hell. Go to hell and die.
And yet! We are pleased to a whole bunch of our favorite money managers made the cut! Despite many of them taking it up the tailpipe last year, they were able to pull through, which brings us immesurable joy. Hopefully their investors can "big picture" it and see things the same way, particularly those in Kensington and Wellington. It's not all about you. Just be happy for him. Lastly, we're told PTJ has decided that this achievement will be the thing that finally gets him to make his fantasy of fucking on a bed of fried chicken* a reality. There's no other way to properly celebrate. Sign up now.

*Or should it be a handy in the bathroom of the Norwalk KFC (his prefered location)? I couldn't decide.

Related

Lawyer: George Soros Reserves His Strength To Plow Through Large Numbers Of Women, Not To Throw Lamps At Them (Like They Do To Him)

If you were to have told me in August 2011 that a story about George Soros's love life involving women 60 years his junior, "on again, off again non-exclusive relationships," dream apartments, broken promises, and broken lamps would still be unfolding 19 months later and getting better at each turn I would have told you to check yourself. And yet it has! With an amazing update that involves George Soros allegedly being assaulted with the light fixture he allegedly assaulted his non-exclusive girlfriend with and an official reminder that George Soros has had sex with more women by 9AM than most people have in their entire lives.

Having George Soros As A Dad Isn't All It's Cracked Up To Be (Well, It Sort Of Is, But Still, It Can Be Tough Sometimes, But Not Usually)

Are there many advantages to being born the son or daughter of a billionaire many times over? Sure. Financial security. Unparalleled opportunities. World is your oyster type stuff. But there's also a dark side that few people ever see or talk about, which can make being astonishingly wealthy by virtue of birth all the more isolating and hard. Today, however, in an effort to show kids born into immense privilege that YOU ARE NOT ALONE, the Times has run a profile of Alexander Soros, son of George, which examines the struggles he faced in coming to terms with being rich. They included: Never getting to live in a McMansion. Alex Soros spent his youth padding around a Charles A. Platt-designed 14-room house on a sprawling country estate in Katonah, N.Y. His mother, Susan Weber Soros, now divorced from his father, founded the Bard Graduate Center for the decorative arts and adorned the house with Sargents and Cassatts. Their place in the city was a duplex at 1060 Fifth Avenue. While his parents worked, he spent much of his time with his younger brother, Gregory, now 23 and pursuing a career as an artist; his nanny, Ping, from China; and the staff...Mr. Soros was acutely aware that he lived in a privileged bubble, and sometimes dreamed of living in a subdivision, where he could play football in the street with other boys. “As a kid, all you want to be is normal,” he said. “When all you’re being fed is vichyssoise, you want to eat Big Macs like everyone else.” Gaining weight. After King Low Heywood Thomas, a prep school in Stamford, Conn., he attended New York University, where he tried to come to grips with expectations that came with his last name. For a period, he brooded, and gained weight. Not being seen as an intellectual. “Alex sought anonymity,” said Adam Braun, a former roommate. “He wanted to be known as the intellectual, not the son of the financier.” Alex hated small talk, Mr. Braun added, and he would ditch parties early to go home and curl up with his Baudrillard. Being seen as a "party-boy" who posted pictures on Facebook with captions like “chilling at dad’s house in Southampton, drinking 40s while cruising on the family boat, and making out with the babes," after posting pictures on Facebook with captions like “chilling at dad’s house in Southampton, drinking 40s while cruising on the family boat, and making out with the babes.” ...after graduation, he came out of his shell and started to socialize. He made new friends, some of whom were nightclub habitués looking to trade on his name, he said. It was around that time that Facebook pictures [“chilling at dad’s house in Southampton, drinking 40s while cruising on the family boat, and making out with the babes"] of him popped up. He was shocked to be portrayed as another helium-weight Hamptons party boy swilling away his trust fund. “I became this caricature,” he said. Ultimately, after "wrestling with his moneyed upbringing," Soros came to grips with who he is and what he's worth, monetarily-speaking. He was born rich and he's OK with that. Mr. Soros, now 26, is taking the stage on his own terms, though in a direction his father clearly approves: philanthropy. Last fall, while pursing his Ph.D. in history at Berkeley, the younger Mr. Soros started the Alexander Soros Foundation. Its stated mission is to promote social justice and human rights...These days, he divides the bulk of his time between Berkeley and New York. Alex admits that his lifestyle is wildly at odds with that of most graduate students. He has a house in North Berkeley, a two-bedroom apartment near Astor Place in Manhattan and a place in South Kensington, London. He collects art by Otto Dix and George Grosz, and has “a couple of Magrittes,” he said. He has also given up on the idea that he can escape public scrutiny. His trip to Florianópolis, a Brazilian island getaway, with buddies a couple of years ago somehow landed on Page Six, which had him partying alongside the actor Stephen Dorff (“I’ve never even met Stephen Dorff,” he said). “I live well,” he told the Times. “I try to stay reasonable, but it’s very hard to say what is reasonable. There’s not a how-to book. In a way, if you try to live quote-unquote normal, you’re being disingenuous.” Making Good On The Family Name [NYT]