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Jeffrey Chiang Will Be Receiving No New Offers Of Employment

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So! Firms are starting to hire again, which is very exciting to those of you trying to improve your situation. Perhaps it's been a while since a lot have gone through this process, and you're a little rusty on the Do's and Dont's. Which why starting today we'll be offering little pearls of accumulated wisdom picked up in the field. Tip one: don't lie about having received an offer from one firm while you're interviewing with another. Tip one-A: if you're going to lie about said fake offer, impersonate someone and forge a little evidence: easy on the typos. Spelling Bank of America without 'c' is going to be a red flag. Jeffrey Chiang knows what we're talking about.

Chiang apparently interviewed at Bank of America, where he was asked if he had any offers from other firms. Jeffrey claimed that he was in his second round of interviews with Morgan Stanley. An associate at BofA then contacted his friend at Morgan about Jeffrey's prospects. The Morgan guy said that contrary to popular belief, JC had only had a phone interview, at which time he claimed to have gotten a full-out offer from BofA. As proof, JC provided a fabricated email allegedly from a recruiting woman at Bank of America, who would probably be surprised to be informed she'd offered Chiang a job (and that she didn't know how to spell "America"). The Morgan people forwarded the faux letter of employment back to the people at Bank of America who were doing recon and from there it was forwarded to the entire free world.
Obviously, the lies here are not good form but what's most upsetting is the lack of effort. There wasn't an ounce of creativity or dancing in this scam (though we did appreciate the demand to be put up at the Four Seasons). In fact, it's downright boring, as scams go. It doesn't come close to a Vayner move, and yet Mr. Chiang has been relegated to the same status as one of the greats. (A list of firms JC will likely not be getting offers from, as gleaned from the outrage expressed by their employees, can be found below). Apparently, though, we now live in a world of diminished expectations where you don't even need a video or a claim to bench press 500 lbs to rile people up or swear they'll never offer you a job. Going forward, you've been warned.
From: Jeffrey Chiang
To: [Morgan Stanley]
Subject: FW: Bank of America Merrill Lynch Interviews
From: [Fake Bank of America ML Recruiter]
To: Jeffrey Chiang
Subject RE: Bank of America Merrill Lynch Interviews
Hi Jeff,
Everyone was very impressed with your interviews today. We are excited
to formally extend to you an offer to join Bank of Ameria [sic]
Merrill Lynch as an analyst next summer. You should be getting
documentation in the mail to sign very shortly. If you have any
further questions please feel free to email me. Again, congratulations
and we look forward to having you join us next year.
From: [Morgan Stanley]
To: [Bank of America ML]
Subject: FW: Bank of America Merrill Lynch Interviews
This is what Jeffrey sent Morgan Stanley to prove he received an offer
from your firm. Given you told me you dinged him, should I assume this
is fake? If so, that's unbelievable and his school should be notified,
he shouldn't get a job anywhere on Wall Street.
From: [Bank of America ML]
To: [Lehman Brothers], [UBS]
Subject: FW: Jeffrey Chiang
I don't know if this guy has come up on your radar screens in terms of
analyst recruits, but you need to be warned about him. I should have
been tipped off by the fact that he ran a "5k marathon" on his resume.
I just figured something got lost in translation.
I interviewed him on campus, and while he was pretty weird/intense, he
seemed like somebody who would crank and potentially make for a good
analyst, so we waved him in for an office visit.
Things started going bad for him when I got a call from our HR
department about him during our Superday. In making his travel
arrangements with our travel agent, he had apparently made a big stink
about needing to stay at the Four Seasons and blow up on the travel
person. It was apparently bad enough that she went to the trouble to
inform our HR department.
Our Superday reviews on him were pretty mixed, nonetheless. He had
spent a summer at Gulfstar, so I did a bit of checking on him there,
and it became clear that they were also very unimpressed with the way
that he carried himself. So, we dinged him, but that is not where the
story ends.
He had told one of the associates in our office that he was in the
second round of interviews for MS's Palo Alto office. Well, our
associate happened to mention this to his friend that works in the MS
Palo Alto office and the associate at MS said that Jeff had had only
had a phone interview but had indicated that he had an offer from
BAML. When the MS team asked him to send proof of his offer, he
manufactured the email below and forwarded to the MS team.
We have notified UT of this joker's behavior, but needless to say,
this guy shouldn't be able to get a job at McDonalds after a stunt
like this.

So far employees from the following firms have been read into the situation (i.e were forwarded the above); all but one claimed to be "shocked" by this "clown" who they believe should "blacklisted," before passing it on. The exception was a representative of Jefferies, who said that JEF could use a guy like JC.
* Bank of America Merrill Lynch
* Citi
* Goldman Sachs
* Morgan Stanley
* JPMorgan
* Credit Suisse
* Lazard
* Tiger Global
* Soros Fund Management
* Raymond James
* RBS Greenwich Capital
* Tudor Investment Corp
* Blackstone
* Calyon
* Blackrock
* CRT Capital Group
* Bain & Co
* BNP Paribas
* Perry Capital
* Oppenheimer & Co.
* Citadel
* BarCap
* Deutsche Bank
* SMH Capital
* Neuberger Berman
* Goldman Sachs JBWere
* Bridgewater Associates
JChiang Resume [PDF]


Brian Moynihan: There Will Be Layoffs

He's not sure who and he's not sure how (many), but apparently cuts are a comin' in 2016.

Convicted Insider Trader Garrett Bauer Hoping College Kids Will Help Him Get Off

Remember Garrett Bauer? For those who need a refresher, GB was a trader (who "mostly worked from home") who was charged last year for running a decades-long insider trading scam with an M&A attorney, Matthew Kluger, that involved stealing information from several law firms. (In April 2011, 20 FBI agents knocked on Bauer's door to arrest him which, while terrifying, didn't come as much of a shock-- the duo had recently become suspicious that the authorities were onto them and, naturally, went about destroying evidence, a process Bauer recounted to a cooperating witness in a conversation he didn't realize was being recorded, telling the CC: "My heart was beating ten thousand miles an hour. I went right up to my apartment and I broke the phone in half and went to McDonald's and put it in two different garabage cans. And someone was watching me. I thought it was an FBI agent. And I asked him, 'Do you know me? You look familiar.' And, like, I was so panicked. I literally didn't sleep that entire night...I can't sleep. I am waiting for the FBI to ride into my apartment. I am on edge all night thinking they are coming in.") Anyway, Bauer ultimately pleaded guilty and is set to be sentenced today. Though he could receive up to 11 years in the big house, a judge will be taking into consideration letters "expressing support or urging leniency" sent on Bauer's behalf, some of which were written by fans he's gained working the college lecture circuit the past few months, explaining to undergrads why they don't want to follow in his footsteps (hint: it involves sleeping on bunk-beds). “I’m here hoping you won’t commit the same crime I committed, insider trading,” Bauer told the students at NYU’s Stern School of Business in February. “I feel remorse. That’s why I’m here. It’s my way of trying to apologize to everyone for what I’ve done and try to make amends.” Bauer said he hopes that his “scared straight” message, delivered in 147 speeches since last fall at business schools, law schools, churches and synagogues, will move the judge to grant him leniency. Sentencing judges can consider whether a defendant has accepted responsibility and shown remorse for his acts. “I’m not blind anymore,” Bauer said in an interview. “I see how wrong it was, how unfair it was to everybody else that’s trading. You get away with it once, and then you think you can get away with it every time. I almost never considered the question of getting caught. It was more a question of let’s figure out a way to make money and not lose money.” Bauer spoke several times a week in person or via Skype at schools including Harvard University, Yale University, the University of California at Berkeley, the University of Texas, the University of Michigan and Duke University. He booked his own speeches, sometimes called “Confessions of an Inside Trader.” Bauer gave the same basic narrative in two appearances observed at NYU, as well as at Cardozo Law School in New York, Drexel University in Philadelphia and a Rutgers University class in Jersey City, New Jersey. Bauer, lean at 5-foot-11 and 145 pounds, favors button-down shirts and khaki pants. He speaks rapidly in a nasal voice, lacing his account with jokes...In every talk to students, Bauer discussed how 20 FBI agents came to his apartment to arrest him and how they played the tapes for him, as well as his time in the Hudson County Jail. He tried hard to show no emotion to violent criminals. “Saying it’s a scary place kind of understates it,” he said. “It’s the scariest place on earth.” At least one professor believes Bauer's talk scarred his students for life, which should count for something. And according to Sameen Singh, a recent Stern grad who will soon start a job at Morgan Stanley, U.S. District Judge Katharine Hayden ought to go easy on the guy, who is just another bro. “I was impressed by how human he was and how his friendships and relationships played a role in his crimes. My friends were quite taken aback by how similar he was to them. He came from humble beginnings, and he’s not a deviant mastermind criminal. He’s just a regular guy.” Prison-Bound Bauer Reprises ‘Confessions Of An Inside Trader’ [Bloomberg]