Charlie Gasparino's self-described "definitive book on the financial crisis," Up In Smoke, comes out tomorrow. Sadly, one of the main subjects of CG's most recent contribution to literature, Jimmy Cayne, will not be available to make an appearance at the party tomorrow evening, which is deeply upsetting to those of us who were hoping to get high in a bathroom stall with the former Bear Stearns CEO. And of course it's upsetting to Chaz, who is well-aware that just one Jimmy Cayne would beat all of the star power Andrew Ross Sorkin had assembled at his soiree last week. Which is why JC knew he had to break it to Gaspo easy. Calling the country reporter this afternoon, after what one can only assume was a seriously successful hotboxing sesh, Cayne, I shit you not, had this to say:
Charlie, I wanted to call and tell you that I'm sorry I can't make the book party. I really wanted to but I'm going to be out of town. I want to wish you the best of luck with the new book, and tell you that you are the greatest reporter in the history of reporting, hands down.
You have an opinion and you stick with it and I respect that. I just wanted to tell you that you're a square guy.