Blow Jobs For Trade Approval, Sodomy And Golden Showers At SAC Capital

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It feels like it's been forever (real time: two years) since the SAC Capital female hormone case, doesn't it? For those of you who shamefully forget, back in the fall of 2007, a former employee of the hedge fund, Andrew Tong, alleged that his boss, portfolio manager Ping Jiang, had forced him to take female hormone pills as part of a slightly unorthodox philosophy of Jiang's that male traders needed to be more like women (not as aggressive, etc) in order to maximize returns. Tong also alleged that he was instructed by Jiang to wear dresses, and as a result of the pills, could not perform sexually with his wife, with whom he was trying to have a baby. Unfortunately, at the time, those were all the details we got. The court filings were sealed, and in early 2008, Jiang was fired (but not because of the hormone stuff! Because he didn't make as much money as the year before, natch). Today, by way of a story by the always awesome reporter Matt Goldstein, we find out a bit more. Goldstein's article is about the "most feared man on Wall Street," if you do stuff like insider trade. He's the guy leading the Galleon investigation for the FBI, and obviously his name is BJ Kang, because how could it not be?
According to Goldstein, court documents and sources indicate that BJ may be "focusing" on SAC next (as previously mentioned, one of the cooperating witnesses in the Galleon case, Choo Beng Lee, worked at the fund for a couple of years). And this isn't the first time The Beej and SAC have crossed paths. In 2006, BJ was part of the team looking into alleged accounting irregularities at Fairfax Financial, and in 2007, BJ was tasked with looking into "a previously undisclosed investigation involving alleged trading irregularities" at SAC, opened by federal prosecutors in Brooklyn (which was later closed). One person BJ interviewed while checking things out? Andrew Tong. And speaking of the Tong-- litigation on the hormone case ended last year, and the previously sealed court documents have been opened. Shall we take a peek inside? If we're up to get down with some seriously disturbing shit, yes! For instance, thongs:

And pet-names:

And the obligatory sodomy sessions, golden showers:

"You'll have to give me a blow job if you want to make that trade."



And an entirely different kind of dirty:


Andrew Tong Filing

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Before They Were Wearing Wires And Trying To Get Each Other To Make Incriminating Statements Re: Securities Fraud, SAC Capital Employees Were Using Threesomes As A Front For Insider Trading

src="https://dealbreaker.com/uploads/2013/05/saccapitalstamford-260x173.jpg" alt="" title="saccapitalstamford" width="260" height="173" class="alignright size-medium wp-image-102764" />Remember Noah Freeman and Donald Longueuil? Former SAC Capital portfolio managers and best buds, fired from SAC for performance and later confronted by the Feds, who divided and conquered the duo by convincing Freeman to record his conversations with Longueuil, which didn't come of much until Noah got Don to give a step-by-step guide to destroying evidence of wrongdoing? Longueuil is set to be released from prison in December and Freeman, who once ran around San Francisco in his underwear while tripping on 'shrooms and shouting "I said buy, motherfucker" at no in particular, is awaiting sentencing. But before they put all this behind them and move on with their lives (Don is taking a three-week honeymoon in January; Noah has hundreds more cities to traipse through half-naked), how about one last trip down memory lane? This one is courtesy of Vanity Fair from a larger article about D&N's boss, and involves the kind of cover for their illegal activities that'd make Ping Jiang curse the fact that their time at SAC didn't overlap.

Things Could Be A LOT Better At SAC Capital Right Now

Back in October, we detailed a list of things that, if you are the hedge fund manager who goes by the name Steven A. Cohen, you really don't want to hear first thing in the morning. They included: “The fleeces are on back order”; “Your ex-wife is in the lobby”; “There’s a photographer here who said he’s been authorized to shoot you wearing a king’s robe and crown for a set of playing cards”; “You’ve been outmaneuvered for the Toledo Mud Hens. But I hear the Binghamton Mets may be available.” Today we must update that list to include another thing, perhaps THE thing,* that people delivering news to Cohen don't want to relay. Paraphrasing but any variants on: "Mr. Cohen, we've received a Wells notice and by the way, they're considering naming you personally."