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UBS: We Have Got To Stop Letting Clients Run For The Exits, Trample Old Ladies On The Way Out, And Set Fire To The Building As They Leave

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Ergo, we must do something to entice them to stay. I'm not saying evade taxes faster, Grübel
needs a new pony. But I'm not not saying it.

UBS AG's chief executive told staff Monday halting the bleeding of assets from its wealthy client division is "imperative," according to a memorandum on ethics provided by the Swiss bank. "Although one-off effects such as tax amnesties are unavoidable, we ourselves must not give clients any reason to leave the bank," Oswald Gruebel says in the memo.

Gruebel, a former Credit Suisse Group CEO, has used regular memorandums to address staff since he was installed as head of UBS last February. Monday's e-mailed memo is devoted to detailing a new code of conduct and ethics for UBS' private bankers.
"What has happened over the past few years must no longer be possible," Gruebel says in the memo.


UBS Sorry About Using The Words "Crap" "Vomit" And "Kewl" Re: Notes It Sold To Hedge Fund Client

Traders at the Swiss bank (presumably!) won't make that mistake again.

Other Banks Ask 'How Are We Supposed To Compete With That?' After UBS Sets The Anniversary Presents Bar Impossibly High

Apparently we spoke too soon when reporting UBS had presented every employee with a "specially commissioned watch" to commemorate the 150th anniversary of the bank's birth, as the gift was actually more of a gift basket that included fine china (which one recipient described as being of "pretty decent quality."