Charlie Gasparino: Lloyd Blankfein Gets A Lotta Hate Mail
Charlie Gasparino reports that his sources are telling him Lloyd Blankfein and Goldman Sachs are so despised the world over that they get "75 to 100 pieces of hate mail in a single day." Chaz wanted to give us a specific number, but doing so would've given away the fact that he himself has been the one faithfully clipping letters from newspapers and magazines each night to send LB variations on "you got some stugots not callin' me back, Lloyd!" ("you better fuckin' call me back, Lloyd!" and "do not test my patience Lloyd or I'm gonna make a bank holding company out of your stugots, LLOYD!"). So, a range of 75-100 it is.
Gaspo also reports, through gritted teeth, that Goldman has bigger things to worry about than his letters, namely "the future of Goldman given all the new regulations that are likely to come out of Washington in the coming months." But don't fooled: Goldman is indeed miffed about the shit they keep getting for doing nothing wrong, while other banks like, I don't know, JPMORGAN could dispatch their CEO to teabag the homeless guy on Park and everyone would crow about what a great and generous guy that Jamie is, to share his balls with someone in need. That why Goldman, according to CG, is considering "launching an all-out media offensive including for the first time TV ads." So! In what sort of scenarios would you like to see Lloyd placed in said ads? Obviously the commercials will have to demonstrate that GS gets it, so should LB be somber? Should he offer an on-air apology? Should he give the people what they really want, by which I mean film himself performing one of these four tasks? Everyone's open to suggestions but I think the last one would go pretty pretty pretty far in ingratiating LB and GS to the people.
