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Mark Your Calendar: Next Greatest Hearing Of Our Time Comin' At Ya May 5

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This is the one we've been waiting for.

James Cayne and Alan Schwartz, who served as chief executive officers at Bear Stearns before the firm collapsed in 2008, will testify on May 5 along with former Securities and Exchange Commission Chairman Christopher Cox, the commission said today in an e-mail statement.

Since recent events have demonstrated the government's inability to ask the right questions, and we want to actually get something out of this thing, let's come up with a few now to send their way. I'll start: Mr. Cayne. When confronted about the fact that your office smelled like pot, you attributed the scent of marijuana to "a new leather couch in my office," and later demanded a fellow executive come take a whiff, asking him, and I quote, "does the couch smell like pot or not?" Did you realize at the time just how genius that was or, in a rare moment of self-awareness combined with a seriously paranoid trip,* did you sweat bullets figuring no one would buy it?

Geithner, Bear Stearns Executives to Testify for Crisis Panel [Bloomberg via DI]

*That's the last time you buy from a degenerate first year in the alley behind 383 Madison.