Do Your Part: Buy Shares In Beer Pong Table Manufacturer Today


Southern Products CEO (CFO, Principal Accounting Officer, and sole director) Tyler Richard, 19, has a dream. A dream to sell custom-made beer pong tables that retail for (starting at) $300 a pop, with "more customized tables" going for $400-$600. Mr. Richard truly believes that no one wants to play this game on some POS ping pong table or any old hard surface they can get their hands on. The demand for an Official Beer Pong table made out of foam and stucco is there. But, there is a bit of a problem.

As of February 28, 2010, we had $9,500 in current assets and current liabilities in the amount of $3,500. Accordingly, we had working capital of $6,000 as of February 28, 2010. Our current working capital is not sufficient to enable us to implement our business plan as set forth in this prospectus. Our management estimates that, until such time that we are able to generate sales revenue sufficient to pay our ongoing and planned expenditures, we will experience negative cash flow in the approximate amount of $2,500 to $3,500 per month. For these and other reasons, our independent auditors have raised substantial doubt about our ability to continue as a going concern. Accordingly, we will require additional financing, including the equity funding sought in this prospectus.

That's where you come in! Southern Products will be offering up to 2,500,000 shares of common stock, at $0.005 per share. The only risk factors, according to Mr. Richard, are the beer pong might go out of style, that Richie has not business experience (he's an undergrad) and that The Company might not be able to keep up with what will surely be a huge demand for these bad boys. Another unlikely risk is the potential for people to die while playing, and the Southern Products could get sued but it's unlikely. And, their auditor says the company has little or no assets and may cease to exist pretty quickly. But just forget about all that. All you need to worry about is getting in on this before it's too late. If you require more convincing, if you need to be finessed, if for some reason you have no idea what the hell beer pong is, have a look at the prospectus. It's all in there, including the rules of the game, and a diagram of a table. This opportunity (probably) won't last.

Southern Products, Inc [SEC]
Southern Products Amendment No. 2 [SEC]


What To Do (Or Not Do) Upon Waking Up In A Car "Driving Through A House," Part II

Back in May, we had a frank discussion about drinking with colleagues and/or clients after work. Specifically, how many drinks one should put away in order to have a good time but not cross any unfortunate lines. At the time, we used a young lady named Sophia Anderson as our guide and said that, assuming you have the tolerance of a 21 year-old female and considered being arrested post-Happy Hour for driving your through a stranger's house one of those lines, no more than a dozen beverages should be consumed, with fourteen being the absolute max. Today we have just a quick update, to those for whom it bears mentioning, that if you're going to ignore said guidelines and have that fifteenth cocktail shortly before accepting a ride home from an equally sloshed coworker who confuses someone's front lawn/foyer/kitchen/backyard patio with the road, you should probably not agree to lie to the police and say you were the one driving. Not even if you're secretly in love with him or her; not even if he or she promises to take take you on vacation after all of this blows over; not even if you were passed out the whole ride and a bit disoriented after "[waking] up as the incident occurred and the car drove through the house." The sneaky punk who conned his drunk and coked-up girlfriend into taking the DWI rap for crashing through, and trashing, a Long Island home in his mom’s Mercedes convertible, was finally charged today with the May 28 crash and ordered held without bail. Suffolk DA Tom Spota said Dan Sajewski, 23, tricked Sophia Anderson, 21, into telling cops that she was behind the wheel when he crashed through the Huntington home of a 96-year-old woman – taking a 30-foot tree with him from the front to the back yard. Spota said the incredible demolition derby was the end result of a night of boozing and cocaine snorting at the $1.7 million mansion of Sajewski’s parents in exclusive Lloyd Harbor – when Sajewski and Anderson took a high speed joyride for more beer. ``We know what really happened that day,’’ said Spota at a press conference after the court session. He said the couple, along with three pals, were doing shots of Jack Daniels and snorting coke at Sajewski’s doctor dad’s home until 4 a.m. The crash occurred during a trip for more Heineken beer, while Sajewski was driving, said Spota. He said Anderson was passed out in the passenger seat and ``told us she wakes up as the incident is occurring and they were driving through the house.’’ Spota said Anderson ``was in love with him’’ and agreed to take the rap, after he promised to pay her bail and legal bills – and take her on a vacation. He broke his word and she revealed it was all a lie. The DA said that when an x-ray technician at the hospital told her she could not have been the driver because of her injuries, Anderson told him ``it’s a little too late for that.’’ LI punk held without bail for May 28 crash that destroyed elderly woman's home [NYP via DI] Earlier: Area Drunk Offers Handy How To Guide Re: Not Being Labeled “That Guy (Who Uses The Front Door Of A House As A Garage Door)” At The Office