Play David Einhorn In Poker And Then Make Him Take You To Lunch

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Do you have plans on August 11? Do you fancy yourself a poker player? A really good poker player? Do you think you could beat David Einhorn, even if he's wearing his lucky sweatshirt? Do you think it would not be so awkward that the two of you could then enjoy a meal together and talk shop after which he picks up the tab? (Go with me on this as I think I might have something you'll be interested in.)

If you answered yes to most of the above and also consider yourself a fan of humanity, helping others and all that jazz, you should most definitely clear your schedule next Wednesday and sign up for a World Poker Tournament benefiting the Rewarding Achievement (REACH) program, which was co-founded by Bill Ackman and Whitney Tilson and gives inner-city high school students academic support and scholarships for passing AP exams. The event is taking place at the Prince George Ballroom in New York and Einhorn (your competition) will be playing, as will Ackman and Tilson. Prizes for winners include the aforementioned meal (a lunch), with Bill, David or Michael Porter, five nights at a "world-class private beach home in Lamu, Kenya," golf and auto racing packages (you get your own car and instructor for the day), and more. Alternatively, if you're not one for cards but still want to help kids, you can also just register for the cocktail hour. I expect you all to be there.

Take 'Em To School Poker Challenge [NYCUP]

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Warren Buffett And David Einhorn Are In Agreement Re: The Frigidity Of Their Disfavored Investment Ideas

Back in February, in his annual letter to investors, Berkshire Hathaway chief Warren Buffett spent a good bit of time discussing why one shouldn't own gold. Beyond the fact that, according to WB, gold doesn't "change in size and [is] incapable of producing anything," and you'd be much better off buying farmland (which "a century from now will have produced staggering amounts of corn, wheat, cotton and other crops and will continue to produce that valuable bounty") or shares of Exxon Mobil (which "will probably have delivered trillions of dollars in dividends to its owners," the Oracle of Omaha had one incontrovertible, be all end all reason for eschewing the metal: its unfuckability. Oh sure, you can do things to a cube, you can fondle it, you can talk dirty to it, you can send nude pictures of yourself, you can even drill a hole in it and fuck it senseless, but, the thing is, the cube will not respond. No reciprocation, no gratitude, not even a sign it enjoyed itself.  For Buffett, no further argument was necessary as to the worthlessness of the commodity. (Silver, on the other hand, will make you feel like you're 18 again.) Anyway, David Einhorn sort of feels the same way about the dollar. Greenlight Capital 1Q2012 Letter To Investors [PDF] Related: Don't Think He Hasn't Tried