If you opened up a paper this week, you may have seen an ad taken out by Goldman Sachs. The full-page spreads, fround in the Wall Street Journal and New York Times, show a worker walking away from a bunch of wind turbines with the copy "progress is everyone's business," and are part of the bank's new pitch to get people to like them, or at least to the point where they can say the firm's name in public without the threat of harm. What did Jerry Della Femina, chairman and chief executive officer of Della Femina/Jeary and Partners think of the spots? Not much. What was Jerry's beef? In his opinion, the Masters of the Universe come off like pussies.
"They are running scared," Jer told Bloomberg. "This is the toughest, strongest, smartest financial company in the world. What are they doing, coming on all whimpering like 'oh, please like us'? If you don't like Goldman, then those people aren't going to care about this. If you're a Goldman fan and you think they're strong and they're driven, then this is going to make you lose a little respect for them. They sound like they're running scared, they sound weak. This is a big, strong, mean company. I want them to sound that way...tell me how strong they are. Tell me how powerful they are. Be a little tougher. Maybe be a little abrasive. This is soft. This is weak. I want to perceive them as being a big strong tough company."
So, okay, let's think. Jerry wants Goldman to show their "power" and not act like a bunch of little bitches. How can we paint this picture? How about a shot of this year's incoming analysts in leather at a biker bar or something? Or maybe Lloyd dick-slapping the SEC? Something like that? A glossy shot of Gary Cohn's testicles? Just the balls, nothing else, maybe lit from behind? Is that too much? Or not enough?