The Job You Want At SAC Capital Involves Swinging A 9-Iron

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To be sure, there are many interesting positions to be had at SAC that most boys and girls would kill for. There's Steve's, which is a pretty good gig. There's IR, which is fun. There's president Cohnheeney's, though few are good looking enough. There's SC's bodyguard, which is exciting and involves a gun. And of course there are the trading slots. They all come with great money, fleece apparel and of course prestige.

But unless you also want serious stress and pressure hanging over your head hour to hour day to day month to month, none of them are for you. You want the job where it is possible to utter the words "I'm gonna take off for a few hours, hit the links, maybe grab a sandwich" during the course of a trading session without fear of having a sand wedge shoved up your ass. You want the job that belongs to Sam Evans, SAC Capital golf pro in residence.

An amateur golfer with a respectable 7-stroke handicap, Evans has found a unique way to marry his golf skills with the big rolodex of corporate executives he struck up friendships with during his time at Donaldson Lufkin Jenrette and more recently Deutsche Bank. A member of more than a half dozen prestigious East Coast golf clubs, Evans has played with an elite group over the years, including former President Bill Clinton.

As part of the hedge fund's business development group, he sets up dozens of golf outings for SAC Capital traders and analysts over the course of a year. Guests at these small gatherings are varied, say investment bank sources familiar with Evans' job description. Invitees might be wealthy individuals from whom Cohen is trying to raise money. Or they might be corporate executives with companies about which the hedge fund is trying learn more. A handful of SAC Capital employees and Wall Street analysts may also tag along from time to time.

...it's clear that there aren’t many on Wall Street, much less at a hedge fund, like Evans, who gets paid to play golf three or four times a week with corporate executives and other rich people at historic courses like Merion Golf Club in suburban Philadelphia or Shinnecock Hills Golf Club on Long Island.

One person told Reuters' Matthew Goldstein that Evans is a "pioneer" in the hedge fund industry, where few if any other firms keep someone like him on payroll. And this is just the beginning. Soon, he'll have an entire team of golf/investing professionals working for him out of Stamford. Now that the word is out, and Sam will likely have people flooding his inbox with resumes, we'd advise you to get in his face now. Throw your clubs in the car and show up to SAC headquarters to let him know you're ready to work. Offer to work as his unpaid apprentice, just to get your foot in the door. The opportunity won't last long.

In The Rough With SAC Capital [Reuters]

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Things Could Be A LOT Better At SAC Capital Right Now

Back in October, we detailed a list of things that, if you are the hedge fund manager who goes by the name Steven A. Cohen, you really don't want to hear first thing in the morning. They included: “The fleeces are on back order”; “Your ex-wife is in the lobby”; “There’s a photographer here who said he’s been authorized to shoot you wearing a king’s robe and crown for a set of playing cards”; “You’ve been outmaneuvered for the Toledo Mud Hens. But I hear the Binghamton Mets may be available.” Today we must update that list to include another thing, perhaps THE thing,* that people delivering news to Cohen don't want to relay. Paraphrasing but any variants on: "Mr. Cohen, we've received a Wells notice and by the way, they're considering naming you personally."