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You Can Thank The FBI For At Least One Thing

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In the spirit of the two holidays being celebrated this week-- Thanksgiving and Insider Trading Fest(ivus) 2010--- let's stop and take a moment to reflect. Many are probably not thankful for the feds' decision to shove a shiv up a number of Wall Street firms' asses. What you can be thankful for, however, is the FBI's probe spawning this-- a wide-ranging theory connected the insider trading, the Chinese government, the MassGOP, and female hormone pills. It's suggested that the following is read in the voice of noted dot connecter, Blenn Geck, with the lights off and a flashlight under one's chin. Drums should beat ominously in the background, too.

From: [redacted]
To: Dealbreaker
Subject: SAC Capitol/Loch Capitol/FBI


Two questions on the ongoing FBI investigation that appears to involve Timothy and Todd McSweeney and Loch Capitol:

1: Is there a Chinese (as in Government of China) connection to any of this? Todd McSweeney's wife, Jeanette Hsu, appears to be of Chinese ancestry, both of the names you listed in your sex scandal story are Chinese, and I do know that the Chinese Govt is very much into American finance -- I had a neighbor (at UMass Amherst) who was a grad student at the UM Isenberg SOM and he was an open (and proud) member of the ChiCom Communist Party and that the party has sent him over here to learn this stuff. Openly told me what the Chinese Govt was trying to do.

(And other Chinese grad students were afraid of him, which more than anything else told me the legitimacy of his claim to be a party member.)

I know the Chinese Govt is spying on us -- a FBI guy at a recruitment seminar this fall openly said so, said that one of the things the FBI does is deal with Chinese espinage. A favorite trick of the Soviets was to have an attractive woman manipulate an American man and I am just asking. It is quite likely that all these people (and I don't know how many more persons of Chinese ancestry are involved) are loyal Americans -- I personally know persons born in China who are exceedingly loyal Americans precisely because they escaped from China and are loyal to this country in a way that only one who has been in the land of forced abortions and the rest could be.

I am wondering though -- is there a conection to Chinese espinage or anything else? (i.e. terrorist money laundering and note that NBC (Brian Ross) is reporting that Homeland Security is desperately seeking two suspected homicide bombers whom they fear will get aboard US aircraft). I hear quietly from a young attorney (unrelated to any of this, but he is not stupid) that "the only thing the FBI seems to care about anymore is terrorism."

And the flip side of all of this -- my ChiCom neighbor/friend told me this -- the Chinese Govt has its own problem with Radical Islam -- they just don't talk about it. They also have their own problems with the North Koreans -- quite a few problems with them -- also not spoken publicly of. Hence on the one hand they would be allies with this on us against a common foe, but on the other hand there is the "better him than me" approach and attacks on Chinese soverignty (and their ability to control a tumultious region) are prevented if they are redirected towards us.

2: Are there any ties between the McSweeneys and the MassGOP? Your SAC 'be a woman' story is in keeping with some of the folk in the MassGOP. From the days of Margaret Chase Smith -- from the days of the Abolitionist movement and the founding of the party -- the GOP has always been a female-friendly party but this "don't be male" stuff that you describe -- both the feminine and gay aspects -- is kinda like what I have been sensing from these MassGOP folk.

I know that there is a strong link between the finance folk and the MassGOP -- that is where the folk in the party seem to come from. (The "old money" folk are Democrats.) Mitt Romney comes out of the finance/venture capitol field (Bain Capitol if I remember correctly) and he is still running for President. Again, I am just wondering...

Blow Jobs For Trade Approval, Sodomy And Golden Showers At SAC Capital

One other thing -- I believe that female hormone pills, at least the real ones with real female hormones -- are prescription medications that require (a) a doctor's prescription and (b) a pharmicist filling it. (Birth control pills are female hormones, I believe they are still all prescription drugs.) What your story did not mention is how the guy obtained the pills he was forced to take, but there quite likely is a Federal offense there - the term is "drug diversion" and from your student days you may have been more familiar with it in the terms of things like Adderall (more tightly controlled than b/c pills because it is Schedule II).

But this is a technical violation of the law which can be prosecuted and I wonder if the FBI is using that fact to obtain cooperation from (a) the now-fired supervisor or (b) the employee -- both of whom you will note have Chinese names.

And hence this tip -- and inquiry.


You Can Add The FBI To The (Long) List Of People Impressed With Jeffrey Gundlach's Brain

There is no denying that Jeffrey Gundlach is a hugely talented man whose IQ would rank among the highest in the world if he ever had it tested. "What's it like having lunch with a genius," he once asked a colleague, who presumably answered, "To be honest, it's giving me an inferiority complex just breathing the same air as you, knowing that your brain is the standard for how intelligence will be measured from now until the end of eternity." Until recently, however, the application of Gundlach's brilliance was largely confined to bond management. According to a new profile by Bloomberg Markets, though, Gundlach's intellectual prowess is just as if not more impressive when it comes to crime solving.

Investment Bank Group Head: Do You Want To Be A Wolf That Starves In The Winter Or Wolf That Eats His Competitors' Fee Pies For Lunch?

Your call. From: [redacted] Sent: March 28, 2012 9:12 AM Subject: Spring Ahead For those with direct/indirect coverage responsibilities, pls take out your lists today to remind yourselves who we have money out to and that your name is on the ComCom coverage team that got that money approved. Anecdotal observation I conclude is that where we pay attention in some reasonable, non-trivial ways (meeting, meal, call, insightful email), we get paid back in flow DCM capital markets participation It's just how this game works, the money doesn't flat out speak for us, we need to speak for it, and we don't have to stomp/yell, just be around, consistently the more frequency, the more client comfort, the more they feel reminded of their commercial obligations to us, the easier it is for them to remember to take care of us -- lubricate to prevent rust, just like a motor engine or morning exercise We've been printing something almost every week this spring, keep the momentum while it's here, and make it grow so it lasts into trough times If you think this message is meant for someone else, it's probably for you too, it is for us all, so don't look sideways for some sort of peer-level comfort, look to your career, which is your clients Junior bankers pushing cogent observations up are as important as senior bankers pushing that stimulus out to clients -- make your time matter most, you own it the world is still an uncertain place, which means our individual and collective ability to create opportunity and make a personal impact is here and now Various of us have teamed up very well on multiple and diverse endeavors within this 2012 Budget year to close out Tier 1, and then re-populate it, so it matters for our Fiscal 2012 In doing so, we have become a Burden to our competitors and a Benefit to our clients, as it should be Those recently Burdened by our direct sharp edge into their fee pie and who would otherwise prefer that we be unmotivated, disorganized, lazy-minded, subservient and acquiescent include: [list of every large bank] With no due respect to their no longer deserved incumbency, I like being where we are, doing what we're doing, and how we're doing it, working and Winning, without the Charlie Sheen meltdowns along the way Welcome to Top 10 there's more food on those complacent plates, they're distracted by entitlement, not watching the table, it's time for the hungry to eat We Hunt and We Gather, sometimes alone, sometimes together both strategies work, and have since mankind became sentient Wherever your personal preferences and natural tendencies may lead you, rise above that and evolve to a more meaningful Hunter/Gatherer contributor to this increasingly productive tribe -- the bigger payout kills require larger organized squads -- wolves hunt in packs for a reason, and every pack needs it's field leader to be best organized -- it's the time-tested proven best use of a wolf pack's collective energy -- if they waste it, they starve in winter -- we're graduating to wolf pack status, it's got our competitors looking, watching, wondering -- for those who've never operated within a wolf pack, come aboard and enjoy the living/learning-by-doing experience!