Commute To Or From Connecticut Every Day? Now Would Be A Good Time To Put In That Request To Work Remotely

Are you a financial services hack who treks into the city every day from points further north or perhaps does the reverse commute to Southern Connecticut? As you may have heard, your life is about start sucking a whole lot more.

Due to half of their cars being rendered useless on account of weather-related repairs, Metro North officials have announced that they can "no longer run regular weekday service on the New Haven line for the indefinite future." Instead, an alternative timetable with a significantly reduced number of trains running will go into effect. (The new schedule actually started this week but for comedic relief, no one at the MTA was informed, nor were the riders.) What will that be like? According to one CT commuter, his Monday ride was “the most crowded train I have ever ridden on Metro-North; we shoehorned people on and off for four stops but by the time we got to New Rochelle, it was impossible to fit anyone else.” There not being enough alcohol on the bar car to get a person through that kind of hell, your options seem to be the following:

* Try and find some perverse pleasure in rubbing up against the guy next to (in front of, to both sides of) you or, depending on height differentials, having your face lodged in his armpit for the duration of the ride

* Put in a request to work remotely and if granted play a game with yourself every day to see how long you can go without looking at porn

* If your request is not granted, stay home but just act as if you're there- when the boss calls asking where you are, he being at your vacant desk, tell him he just missed you and that you're "down in file storage" and "No, sir, I can't find the Goodwin file anywhere. Yes sir, I'll keep looking. I don't rest until I find it."

* Get your firm to sponsor some sort of party bus situation (SAC used to have a shuttle that would take employees to/from CT but they got rid of it; bring it back but this time, add disco balls, Schnapps)

* Organize a carpool with colleagues, spending even more time with the people you despise

* Become a regular at Beamers, where they'll eventually be cool with you crashing on the couches in the back for a few hours every night

* Demand black car service on the reg

* Live under a bridge or in a box near l'office

Any other ideas?