Earlier today, Bank of America reported a $2.05 billion profit, a thirty-six percent drop from the first quarter of 2010. Still, as this represented the first time the bank had made money in three quarters, those in Charlotte felt pretty good about themselves this morning and hoped analysts and the market would give them props for a job relatively well done. Baby steps and all that jazz. Instead, all BofA heard was how it didn't live up to anyone's expectations and its stock took a kick in the pants. Despite the fact the bank has said itself by way of "Project New BAC," wherein first year analysts have been asked "why don't you tell us" how to turn a profit, that it needs a timeout from being as harshly judged as other firms and valued by the numbers, it was all "you've disappointed us this" and "why can't you be more like JPMorgan" that. And apparently profit isn't the only thing on which people won't get of Moynihan and Co's back about.

From an analyst who shall remain nameless but is apparently taking careful notes:

"Proper grammar is not a priority at BAC. Around 1hr and 1min into this morning's earnings call, the phrase "most riskiest" was used to describe home equity loans.