Let Goldman Sachs Help You Get Your Shake Shack Order In Under 3 Hours Today

Author:
Updated:
Original:

One of the great equalizers in the city of New York, whether you're a CEO or a summer intern, a billionaire or a mere hundred thousandaire involves beef. Specifically, that found at Shake Shake. Come summer, everyone in this city** waits an ungodly amount of time for their order at Shake Shack, no matter who they are. Senior employees at Credit Suisse, whose building is located across from the original Madison Park Shack, have attempted work-arounds for years, i.e. sending junior staff to wait on line and place orders for them, but still, they wait. Today, however, two viable options for not spending three hours waiting for your Double Shack Burger have emerged. Naturally, they come courtesy of the innovators at Goldman Sachs.

1. Get a job at Goldman Sachs or
2. Work near their downtown office and figure out the secret hand signal that was clearly used in the following scenario:

Was just at the newly opened Shake Shack across street from GS building. Standing next to a GS employee complaining that his order is taking forever, manager of Shack comes over and says "it's on the Goldman private grill, I'm sorry there was a big order in front of you, that's all I can do." (The SS is open to the public but GS owns the building, which I guess is how they got the private grill.)

Also important to note: while an ID badge and/or intel on the hand signal/secret password/what have you used by those who want to get on the GS grill when ordering will put you ahead of those in the peasant section, if you want really speedy service, you'd best figure out how to get on the upper right quadrant, reserved for LB and those who've truly earned it. And don't believe them when they say there's no bacon on the menu. In the upper right quadrant, there is.

**Except those of us who actually wouldn't even rank SS in their Top 10 of burgers.

Related