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Black Eyed Peas Too Good To Sing Live For Deutsche Bank

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Last week, Deutsche Bank held a party for a few hundred clients at a resort in England. The event was catered by celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal, who created "hundreds of gin and tonic meringues, cooked in front of guests in liquid nitrogen," included spa treatments and unlimited rounds of golf and was deemed an "exquisite experience" for all attendees. Having said that, there were some behind the scenes issues when it came to the evening's entertainment, the mistakes of which any firm planning a conference/weekend/what have you in the future should take note. Initially, Deutsche Bank, for some reason, had hoped to wow clients with a performance by the Black Eyed Peas. Unfortunately, the Germans were apparently unaware of the fact that this supergroup of artistic purists believe they're in a position to play hard ball.

Organisers had initially contacted one of the world’s biggest bands, The Black Eyed Peas, asking them to perform instead. ‘They had offered even more money to The Black Eyed Peas to appear,’ a source revealed. ‘Unfortunately the group’s management said they refused to perform live for the bankers, even for that kind of money, and would only lip-sync to their hits.

While the Peas undoubtedly do believe they're too good to strain their vocal chords and memorize lines for a group of financial services employees, what was clearly lost in translation was that the band has a tiering system and that this is how they negotiate. Deutsche was supposed to come back to the table and offer more, at which time Fergie would have explained to them that the bronze level (£1,000,0000) gets you a methed out Fergie (you supply the meth) plus 10 minutes of lip-syching, silver (£5,000,0000) gets you 30 minutes of lip-syching and attitude and gold gets (£10,000,0000) you an actual live performance. DB organizers did not know this, though, and simply told the Peas to piss off, as they could do better. Potential nip-slip better.

Deutsche Bank wanted to have a live act though and went with Janet Jackson instead...Miss Jackson, 45, performed hits such as Control, Rock With You and The Best Things In Life Are Free during her brief set – which cost Deutsche Bank a staggering £11,111 a minute. A stage and huge marquee were put up for the star’s performance, at a cost of £150,000.

[Daily Mail via BI]


Deutsche Bank Managing Director, LAPD Not Yet Seeing Eye To Eye On Savage Beating "Incident"

Yesterday afternoon, Deutsche Bank vice chairman and managing director Brian Mulligan filed a claim with the city of Los Angeles, letting it be known that he plans on suing for $50 million, over an altercation with the LAPD that left Mulligan with "a broken shoulder blade and 15 nasal fractures." According to the media banker, he was minding his own business one night in May, when a couple of officers approached him, asked him what he was doing in the vicinity of a marijuana dispensary, searched his car (where they found a few thousand dollars), drove him to a motel and told him to wait there. Several hours later, still waiting, Mulligan says he started to become suspicious and decided to leave, at which point the officers returned and "began ruthlessly beating him" so badly he "barely looked human" when they were done. If this had happened to you, you might be a little upset too! The LAPD, however, claims that Mulligan has no reason to be angry with them and, in fact, owes the officers an apology, for his "outburst of erratic behavior." The police version begins with a complaint about a man going through cars in a Jack-in-the-Box in the Highland Park area, according to LAPD Officer Cleon Joseph. Moments later, a second call came from another person about a man in the same area who appeared to be on drugs and trying to break into cars...The officers determined Mulligan matched the description of the suspect, but a police drug recognition expert determined he was not under the influence of drugs. Joseph said he could not clarify whether that included alcohol. Officers then searched Mulligan's car and found thousands of dollars, Joseph said. Mulligan told the officers that he was exhausted, so the officers agreed to transport him to a motel, Joseph said. But first, they had to count the executive's cash to make sure it was all still there after they transported him to the hotel, Joseph explained. The officers gave Mulligan's money back to him, drove him to the motel and left him, concluding their response, Joseph said. A few hours later, at about 1 a.m., police received another call from the same area, this time about a man running in traffic. Officers observed Mulligan in the street, Joseph said. He defied officers' orders to get out of the street, and instead went into a fighting stance and charged at the officers, according to Joseph. Officers tackled Mulligan and took control of him, Joseph said. During the take-down, the executive sustained injuries that required hospitalization. Police reported the incident as a categorical use of force and are conducting a standard investigation to determine if the force was necessary. Mulligan was charged with resisting arrest and interfering with law enforcement. He was booked on $25,000 bail and was released from jail on May 18. Despite Mulligan acting in such a way that some people thought required "force" to deal with, a spokesman for the LA County DA's office said that there are no plans to file criminal charges and that the office would simply like to "have a discussion with him and advise him on how best to follow the law so that incidents like this don’t occur again." Brian Mulligan, Deutsche Bank Executive, Says He'll Sue LAPD Alleging Captive Beating [HP] Deutsche Bank Top Hollywood Banker Claims Police Beating [Bloomberg]


Deutsche Bank: It's All Good

Everyone is apparently freaking out over nothing.

Cutting Expensive Grape Juice From Deutsche Bank Board Meetings A Bridge Too Far For John Cryan

You didn't get a bonus this year but the $$$ grape juice is here to stay.

Layoffs Watch '12: Deutsche Bank

The Germans are considering sending some bankers to live on a farm upstate, where there's plenty of fresh air and room to run around. Europe’s biggest bank by assets, is considering cutting about 1,000 positions at its investment bank as revenue declines, according to a person with knowledge of the matter. The cuts will be mostly outside Germany, where the firm’s investment banking operations are focused, said the person, who asked not be identified as Deutsche Bank’s plan hasn’t been made public. [Bloomberg]