Are you running a hedge fund out of Bumblefuck, USA? Do you feel like having a New York area code could help you take this thing to the next level but lack the funds necessary for a move? Dennis Mkyktyn may be able to help. In 2003 the former hedge fund manager had the foresight to buy a bunch of 212 numbers- 100 to be exact-, knowing that one day people like yourselves would be doing unspeakable things to get their hands on one.

“It’s prestigious,” said Mr. Mykytyn, who runs a record label, Modern Records, in an office at Lafayette and East Fourth Streets. “When 212 is on your phone, everyone knows where that it is, and it means you’ve been around for a while..It’s old-school New York. The number represents a business that’s been around for a long time,” he said. Mr. Mykytyn is able to use the 212 cachet wherever he likes; he said he receives calls to his 212 number in Los Angeles because the phone service is digital. “I had an analyst working for me in Minnesota who had a 212 number,” he said. “If anyone called, they thought he was in New York.”

So he's clearly playing coy right now but as you and we all know, everyone's gotta price. Name yours and in the unlikely event he doesn't cave, we'll hook you up with a guy hoarding an arguably more prestigious** area code- the 203. He's sitting on millions of them, literally, and while you might have to videotape yourself admitting to your co-workers you think professional wrestling is real to get 'em, it'll be worth it.

Want A 212 Number? This Man Has 100 Of Them [NYT via FINalternatives]

**If you exclude 50% of the towns it covers.