Andrew Ross Sorkin Declares Zuccotti Park Safe For Bank CEOs

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As you may have heard, there are protests going on downtown, organized by a group of individuals who've got beef with the financial industry. They've gone on longer than most would've expected (with at least one promise made that no one is leaving "until Wall Street crumbles") and despite being peaceful so far (on the side of the protestors-- the NYPD, not so much), have started making some people a little nervous. Specifically, those who run the banks OccupyWallStreet takes issue with. Luckily, nobody needs to live in fear, because of three simple words: Andrew Ross Sorkin. Little known fact about ARS is that in addition to overseeing Dealbook, writing books and anchoring Squawk Box, the hardest working man in America also runs a part time private security firm. Knowing about Sorkin's side-gig, one CEO** got him on the horn last week to figure out what's what.

I had gone down to Zuccotti Park to see the activist movement firsthand after getting a call from the chief executive of a major bank last week, before nearly 700 people were arrested over the weekend during a demonstration on the Brooklyn Bridge. “Is this Occupy Wall Street thing a big deal?” the C.E.O. asked me. I didn’t have an answer. “We’re trying to figure out how much we should be worried about all of this,” he continued, clearly concerned. “Is this going to turn into a personal safety problem?”

Andrew wasn't sure but knew that a job this big required he check out the scene himself, rather than sending some doe-eyed intern from his team.

As I wandered around the park, it was clear to me that most bankers probably don’t have to worry about being in imminent personal danger. This didn’t seem like a brutal group — at least not yet...As I was leaving, having spoken to scores of protesters, I noticed two of them walking over to the A.T.M. at Bank of America. As much as this group may want to get away from Wall Street and corporate America, it may be trapped by it. In the eyes of these young protesters, until they can unshackle themselves from the system — or perhaps make the system work for them — the sense of unrest is unlikely to go away anytime soon.

In sum: everyone breathe easy. For those who remain concerned, Sorkin has a trunk full of ADT security stickers you can post on the window of your office to ward off any would-be hooligans. You're all gonna be okay.

On Wall Street, A Protest Matures [Dealbook]

**No way in hell this was Lloyd, who isn't scared a few kids. You can take the boy out of the Linden Projects but you can't take the Linden Projects out of the boy!

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Come Between Andrew Ross Sorkin And His Pita Chips, Take Your Life Into Your Own Hands

It's often been said, in profiles, conversations, and the like, that Andrew Ross Sorkin is the hardest working man in America, juggling several  jobs at any given time. Up until now, the ones we knew about were 1) Dealbook editor 2) Squawk Box host and 3) author. Today we've learned of yet another title he holds: (self-described) Human Garbage Disposal. "If food is in front of me, I have to eat it," Sorkin told Grub Street, while taking part in its "New York Diet" series, an accounting of one person's food intake over a given week. From March 2 to March 7 we get to see ARS's appetite in action, destroying everything in its wake. Yogurt (Fage peach), his children's chicken nuggets, Chinese food, coffee ice-cream, tomato soup, mushroom soup, peanut butter brownies, turkey sandwiches, margaritas, Red Bull, oysters, Muscle Milk, pretzels, steak, salmon, Chirpin' Chicken, sweet-potato fries. It's actually quite mesmerizing. And that's just what he consumes for sustenance. Here's what he goes weak in the knees for. Anything that came out of a deep-fryer: "...we ended up at Five Points where I had two spicy margaritas and ruined [my] workout within in twenty minutes. I also had a spinach salad, rockfish, and a chocolate brioche bread pudding and apple crisp to die for. Give me anything baked or fried and ... forget it. Donuts, Glazed: "All is well in the world, until someone brings Dunkin' Donuts to theTimes office. No will power around glazed doughnuts. I could eat a whole table of them. They're classic and timeless, without being too sugary and complicated." Bread pudding, which he'll eat off the plate of a source: "In between MSNBC and the Times, I went to lunch with two venture capitalists at Michael's. Their choice, not mine. I like it there because that's how people know you haven't died yet. Ate salmon with mustard and sorbet for dessert. Okay, the venture capitalists offered me some bread pudding, and I got all in on that, too." His Stacey's Pita Chips. Do not get him started.: "Now I really go off the rails at home. It starts with a glass of red wine and half a bag of Stacey Chips. Then I eat more, but with hummus. They're the greatest chips in the history of all chips. When I was writing my book three years ago, I'd go to a bodega at eleven o'clock at night for a liter of Diet Coke, a couple beers, and my Stacey Chips." Andrew Ross Sorkin Will Eat Anything You Feed Him, Especially If It Is Baked or Fried [Grub Street]