Blankfein says he's probably cured; Bain and TPG join suitors for Yahoo unit; Bass on China; Vermont tattoo shop offers free Bernie Sanders tattoos; and more.

$$$ Draghi kills hope of instant action [FT] $$$ Mario Draghi's rescue plan for the euro: So that's what he meant [Economist] $$$ Goldman to Invest in City Jail Program, Profiting if Recidivism Falls Sharply [NYT] $$$ BofA in talks with Fannie Mae over mortgage dispute [Reuters] $$$ Missile Defense Staff Warned To Stop Surfing Porn Sites [Bloomberg via DI] $$$ New York Yankees Facebook Page Announces Derek Jeter To Miss Rest Of Season Due To Sex Change [Deadspin] $$$ Want to decide how much people at BlackRock get paid? They're looking for a Senior Compensation/Total Rewards Analyst in New York [DBCC] $$$ Facebook: The Stock That Keeps on Dropping [BBW] $$$ Europe Keeps Weighing on GM's Results [WSJ] $$$ Pimco’s El-Erian Says World in Serious Slowdown [Bloomberg] $$$ Romney's Horse Ranks 13th In Olympic Debut [WSJ] $$$ "Some account holders want to withdraw their money. I ask them why and give it to them if other children approve. Everyone earns five per cent interest on their savings." [Kottke]

$$$ S&P cuts Spain credit rating to BBB-minus, near junk [Reuters] $$$ E-Mails Appear to Back Lawsuit’s Claim That Equity Firms Colluded on Big Deals [DealBook] $$$ Tarullo Calls for Cap on Bank Size [WSJ] $$$ Political backlash over BAE deal collapse [FT] $$$ First-week Bain Capital analyst sort of attempts to buy Gawker, Gawker explains birds and bees, analyst concludes "This is awkward." [Gawker] $$$ A financial services firm is looking for an enterprise risk manager in Philadelphia [DBCC] $$$ Stocks Skid Into Earnings Pothole [WSJ] $$$ Narula Masters Fed, Beats Funds With 500% Gain [Bloomberg] $$$ Citing Deep Data Collections, Senator Opens Inquiry of Information Brokers [NYT] $$$ Pro-Life Congressman Recorded Himself Convincing Mistress to Get an Abortion [DI]

$$$ IIF Bank Group: Greek Debt Buyback Likely To Reach Target [WSJ] $$$ Doing the Shareholder Sidestep [DealBook] $$$ Netflix CEO Hastings Faces SEC Action Over Facebook Post [Bloomberg] $$$ Rush to set up ‘ultra-short’ bond funds [FT] $$$ Bain leads private equity firms in use of low-tax payouts [Reuters] $$$ Financial Times Discovers Hip-Hop Slang From Last Century [DI] $$$ A multi-billion-dollar asset management firm is looking for a quantitative execution junior equities trader in New York [DBCC] $$$ Partners’ Stake in Goldman Sachs Rises [DealBook] $$$ Defaulted Bondholders Undeterred as Gains Hold [Bloomberg] $$$ Will JPMorgan's 'Jes' Staley Jump Ship? [CNBC] $$$ Brooklyn couple makes breakup video to announce split to their friends [NYDN via Kevin Roose] $$$ Snoop [Lion] Asked Himself a Question About His Own Weed Habits on Reddit [NYO]

$$$ Gawker acquires semi-public audited financials of Bain Capital funds, orgasms all over them [Gawker, related] $$$ Bain Capital's conversion of management fees into carry may have been tax aggressive [Victor Fleischer] $$$ Republicans eye return to gold standard [FT] $$$ New York Fed Sells Last of AIG Bonds, at a Profit [WSJ] $$$ "Hedge Funds, Grimacing, Open the Kimono" [Bloomberg] $$$ BlackRock would like to hire a securities lending accounting associate in San Francisco, if that's your cup of tea [DBCC] $$$ The Downsizing of the American Butler [CNBC] $$$ What's up with Best Buy? [DealBook] $$$ Citi passed its make-up stress test [Reuters] $$$ Seven-Year-Old Wins Iceland Ram Groping Contest [Iceland Review via MR]

$$$ Fed Is 'Playing a Game With Us:' Pimco's Gross [CNBC] $$$ Bundesbank steps up pressure on Draghi [FT] $$$ Broker departures accelerate at Merrill Lynch [Reuters] $$$ The head of credit trading at Credit Suisse has been fined £210,000 for disclosing confidential information about a forthcoming €2.5bn bond issue after inviting a UK fund manager to “play charades” and guess the identity of the issuer. Nicholas Kyprios encouraged a fund manager who had been invited by Credit Suisse to a roadshow in November 2009 for an unnamed company to guess the issuer, using phrases like “you’re getting warmer”, the Financial Services Authority said. [FT] $$$ How would you like to be a Fixed Income Business Management Analyst for BlackRock in New York? [DBCC] $$$ Goldman Hires a New P.R. Chief $$$ Euro Zone Split over Financial Transaction Tax [Der Spiegel] $$$ Fred Wilpon's lawyers have planned a whole range of distractions for their Madoff trial [WSJ, related] $$$ Robert Lacoursiere, the Paulson & Co. partner who oversaw the $23 billion hedge fund’s team of banking analysts, quit last week after four years to start his own fund, according to a person with knowledge of the matter. [Bloomberg] $$$ Manhattan madam's 'sidekick' turns herself in, released on $100K bail [NYP]

$$$ Excited for Whale day? [Reuters] $$$ Banks’ Libor costs may hit $22bn [FT] $$$ Bain Starts Raising Buyout Fund With $6 Billion Target [Bloomberg] $$$ PFG Employee Files Lawsuit for Wages so he could afford the new leash, harness and doggie bed he had bought for Apple, his terrier mix [FINS] $$$ Piggy bank has a new meaning in a town east of Vienna after a surveillance camera caught a wild pig on a night foray to a local branch of one of Austria’s financial institutions. The Austria Press Agency reports that the inquisitive porker managed to push open a locked sliding glass door of a bank in Hainburg an der Donau to make its way inside. After looking around, it left the same way it came without causing significant damage, with the door locking behind it. [AP] $$$ A prominent broker-dealer is looking for a junior non-agency mortgage trader [DBCC] $$$ Richard Posner: Why There Are Too Many Patents in America [Atlantic] $$$ Goldman recruits former Treasury spokesman [FT] $$$ In spite of the Barclays scandal, LIBOR product continues to do well [Sober Look] $$$ Here you will find NSFW pictures of dinosaur loving [Daily Mail]