Write-Offs: 01.19.12

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$$$Google's results fall short, rare miss pummels shares [Reuters]

$$$Hedge-Fund Investors Pull Cash [WSJ]

$$$Credit Suisse wins $7bn AIG securities auction [FT]

$$$ Actually several desks at Goldman bathe ritually in blood before their morning call. Matt Taibbi knows this. [Daily Intel, cf. John Carney/NetNet]

$$$ Only half of college lacrosse players smoke pot [Bloomberg via Deadspin]

$$$Click here to buy tickets to a Jay-Z show at Carnegie Hall (including premium seats and boxes, which include additional access and perks, including pre- and post-show receptions and access to the after party at the 40/40 Club) that benefits the United Way of New York City and the Shawn Carter Scholarship Foundation.

$$$Is the Porn Industry Imperiled? [CNBC]

$$$SocGen, BNP Job Cuts Reflect Wilting Ambitions of Paris Banks [Bloomberg]

$$$ More things Mitt Romney invented [WSJ, earlier, also earlier]

$$$ Like private equity partners, junior law firm associates sometimes retrade [NetNet]

$$$ Everyone has a favorite strange Bloomberg headline. "George Washington Wine Cooler Sells for $782,500 at Christie’s" is mine. [Bloomberg]

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Write-Offs: 01.22.13

$$$ RBS speeds up investment arm split [Telegraph] $$$ How much value does the finance industry create? [Noahpinion] $$$ Leverage can increase volatility and diversification can reduce risk [WSJ] $$$ Why London hedge fund wives don’t do Switzerland [EFC] $$$ Cheese fire causes traffic meltdown in Norway tunnel [Reuters] $$$ Registration for the 5th annual Decathlon starts today! This year’s competition takes place on July 28th, and also includes monthly “Throw Downs” where all registered Decathletes compete in 1-2 Decathlon events and collect charity bets on head-to-head match-ups (40 yard dash! Pull-ups! Bench press!). All proceeds benefit the Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. $$$ A hedge fund in New York is looking for a quantitative macro strategist/economist [DBCC] $$$ Wells Fargo Lifts Quarterly Dividend 14% [FBN] $$$ Deutsche Bank Said to Be Asked by Bafin to Simulate Split [Bloomberg] $$$ Schroders Worker Among FSA Insider-Trading Probe Arrests [Bloomberg] $$$ Is seducing executives in order to get and trade on inside information illegal? [NetNet / John Carney] $$$ ‘Your Cat Is Not Innocent’: New Zealand Man Launches Campaign to Rid Country of Cats [Gawker]

Write-Offs: 11.15.12

$$$ BP to Plead Guilty to Felonies, Pay $4.5 Billion in Spill [WSJ] $$$ Eurozone slides back into recession [FT] $$$ House panel suggests SEC-CFTC merger after MF Global [Reuters] $$$ "With their boozy client dinners, big bonuses and foul-mouthed traders, interdealer brokers are stalwarts of a financial order that is in retreat." [Economist] $$$ John Carney went to a bar [NetNet] $$$ Henry Blodget: Why do some people hate women? [Gawker, earlier, earlier] $$$ William Blair is looking for a private capital associate in Chicago [DBCC] $$$ In a Switch, Investors Are Buying European Bank Bonds [DealBook] $$$ Fed Orders Largest Banks to Test Against Deep U.S. Recession [Bloomberg] $$$ SEC Report Finds Faults With Credit Raters [WSJ] $$$ Soccer no excuse for outdoor sex, Italy court rules [Reuters via Amy Tennery] $$$ Maine GOP chairman "play[s] basketball every Sunday with a black guy" [DI]

Write-Offs: 06.20.12

$$$ Fed Extends Twist, Signals Concerns [WSJ] $$$ Reasons to be sad about the Fed [Tim Duy] $$$ Berlusconi Casts Doubt on Austerity Plan [WSJ] $$$ Rompuy Blueprint Said To Include Options On Debt, Bank Oversight [Bloomberg] $$$ Standstills in Change of Control Transactions [HLS] $$$ With all words from Greek, Roman, Norse, etc. myths already taken, Peter Thiel named a fund after a metal from The Lord of the Rings [DI] $$$ A leading New York hedge fund is looking for a general counsel - could it be you? [DBCC] $$$ Regulators Back Off Tougher Curbs on Oil [WSJ] $$$ Ex-Orioles player Eddie Murray is part of insider trading inquiry [Reuters] $$$ The Mormon Madoff: How Shawn Merriman Scammed Millions $$$ NYSE CEO: Public Has Lost Trust inMarket [WSJ] $$$ Madam still stuck at Rikers [NYP]

Write-Offs: 6.8.15

DoJ probes banks for rigging Treasuries market; Greece still Greece; Hedge funds not sweating collusion probe; Kate Moss calls pilot 'basic b*tch' as she's escorted off airplane; and more.