Twitter earnings; Greece, Standard Chartered seen better days; Convicted insider trader sentenced to jail sentenced to more jail; "Naked Idiot On The Field Absolutely Flattened By Rugby Player"; and more.

$$$ Eurozone delays Athens rescue funds [FT] $$$ Loans to Banks Cool Debt Crisis [WSJ] $$$ European Leaders Challenged by Rise in Joblessness [NYT] $$$ An explanation of that Barclays tax trade, with cartoons [FTAV] $$$ Sofa King can no longer advertise prices that are "Sofa King low" in the UK [Language Log] $$$ Mitt Romney has worn a garbage bag for rain gear $$$ Fed's Dilemma: Markets Want Both Growth—And Stimulus [CNBC] $$$ Facebook seeking bigger credit line [Reuters] $$$ Unlike other types of complex financial transactions, insider trading prosecutions usually do not require jurors to develop sophisticated knowledge of the financial markets or securities valuation. There is not a statutory definition establishing its parameters, so it can be applied to a wide variety of transactions, and the crime does not have complicated requirements for proving a violation. Prosecutors are cracking down on insider trading because there's no law telling people what's illegal and unsophisticated jurors will convict [DealBook] $$$ Oprah's Book Club makes people read less [MR] $$$ The personal assistant of Paris Hilton's sister's hedge funder ex-husband Todd Meister was maybe dating him while she was stealing $1mm from him, or something like that [NYP]

James Gorman tells markets to chill; Blythe raises cash; "Why the Best Place in the World to Network Is Inside a Davos Van"; Facebook moonshine probe leads to three arrests; and more.

$$$ Gold Sinks Into Bear Territory [WSJ] $$$ JPMorgan Switches Risk Model Again After Whale Loss [Bloomberg] $$$ US Senate scales back insider law [FT] $$$ Spain Eases Rules in Move Seen Helping Convicted CEO [WSJ] $$$ Ex-Credit Suisse trader pleads guilty in MBS case [Reuters] $$$ Mayo Tells Wells Fargo Execs Results ‘Stunk’ [Deal Journal] $$$ When options trading ahead of deals raises eyebrows [Reuters] $$$ Notes from the DoubleLine Lunch with Jeffrey Gundlach, Spring 2013 [Reformed Broker] $$$ Doubts over new CDS futures [IFR] $$$ High-Speed Trader Said to be Considered for SEC Post [Bloomberg] $$$ Billionaire Koch Wins $12 Million Verdict in Wine Trial [Bloomberg] $$$ Sarasota Man Steals Ten Cans Of Axe Deodorant From Publix Store, Assaults Security Guard, Broken Bicycle Chain Foils Getaway [Global Dispatch]

$$$ S&P 500 Breaks Record [WSJ] $$$ M&A Stumbles Amid March Deal Drought [Bloomberg] $$$ An interview with Athanasios Orphanides: What happened in Cyprus [Economist] $$$ Sarkozy: from the Elysée to private equity [FT] $$$ Embattled DOE-Grant Recipient Changes Name from A123 to B456 [WFB] $$$ Posting will be light tomorrow for Good Friday. Enjoy the holiday; we'll see you back here on Monday. $$$ Dell paying Blackstone's bills [Fortune] $$$ Investors sue RBS over 2008 rights issue [FT] $$$ REITs Trigger Fed Warning as Kain Tops $100 Billion [Bloomberg] $$$ Citi Sails Back Into 'Synthetic' Securities [WSJ] $$$ New York Is ‘By Far the Least Free State’ in America, According to Some People [DI] $$$ THE OTHER SIDE OF THE GITMO STRIKE: Detainees Are Treated Absurdly Well Compared To Business Insider Reporters [BI]