$$$ S.E.C. Enforcement Chief Khuzami Steps Down [DealBook] $$$ Dimon Says JPMorgan Executives ‘Acted Like Children’ on Loss [Bloomberg] $$$ S.E.C. Opens Investigation Into Herbalife [DealBook] $$$ Here you can watch an inspirational video about Herbalife called "Our Herbalife" [YouTube] $$$ "It doesn't travel as a coin. It stays in a container. And the container itself is small enough to carry, but certainly not small enough to put in your pocket. That's kind of how we protect it. So once you put it in the container, it kind of moves in the container. And probably we'd keep it in a container even at Fort Knox. I remember when I was in the military, the keys in the orderly room were on a long stick, like a broomstick. And I said to the sergeant, how come you do that, and he said, "So nobody can put it in their pocket." That's kind of how you do security [for a trillion-dollar coin] also." [DI] $$$ RBC is looking for an analyst for its Derivatives Solutions Group in New York [DBCC] $$$ Soros Hong Kong portfolio manager Jixin Dai departs, plots standalone fund [AR] $$$ SEC Claims KPMG Auditors Failed to Scrutinize Nebraska Bank [Bloomberg] $$$ "For people like me, on the other hand, the economy is a social system, created by and for people. Money is a social contrivance and convenience that makes this social system work better — and should be adjusted, both in quantity and in characteristics, whenever there is compelling evidence that this would lead to better outcomes." [Paul Krugman] $$$ Apparently people read Business Insider in bed [BI]

Third Avenue meltdown; Trader vs CFTC; "​How I Get Men to Give Me Money for No Reason as a Financial Dominatrix"; and more.

$$$ IIF Bank Group: Greek Debt Buyback Likely To Reach Target [WSJ] $$$ Doing the Shareholder Sidestep [DealBook] $$$ Netflix CEO Hastings Faces SEC Action Over Facebook Post [Bloomberg] $$$ Rush to set up ‘ultra-short’ bond funds [FT] $$$ Bain leads private equity firms in use of low-tax payouts [Reuters] $$$ Financial Times Discovers Hip-Hop Slang From Last Century [DI] $$$ A multi-billion-dollar asset management firm is looking for a quantitative execution junior equities trader in New York [DBCC] $$$ Partners’ Stake in Goldman Sachs Rises [DealBook] $$$ Defaulted Bondholders Undeterred as Gains Hold [Bloomberg] $$$ Will JPMorgan's 'Jes' Staley Jump Ship? [CNBC] $$$ Brooklyn couple makes breakup video to announce split to their friends [NYDN via Kevin Roose] $$$ Snoop [Lion] Asked Himself a Question About His Own Weed Habits on Reddit [NYO]

China; Stress tests; Another broker cleared in Libor trial; "World's Greatest Athlete Plays Ping-Pong With His Penis"; and more.

$$$ SEC Opens Review of J.P. Morgan [WSJ] $$$ $$$ Chesapeake Energy: How To Lose $1 Billion In 46 Minutes [MarketBeat] $$$ Facebook's IPO already oversubscribed [Reuters] $$$ "The new lead investigator at the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission's watchdog office has been placed on administrative leave after he talked openly about wanting to carry a concealed firearm at work and some employees complained he was a physical threat, according to people familiar with the matter." [CNBC, related] $$$ Are Dads the New Moms? [WSJ] $$$ An elite credit focused hedge fund is seeking a trade assistant for its CDS desk in New York [DBCC] $$$ Avon Board Said to Study Coty Diligence Request [Bloomberg] $$$ This is a pretty cool idea for shareholder lawsuit settlements [M&A Law Prof Blog] $$$ John Travolta's lawyer calls third claim of sexual advances 'ridiculous' [NYP] $$$ Failed Buffett dinner auction still draws donation [CNBC]

$$$ Facebook Posts Loss, But Emphasizes Mobile Growth $$$ LightSquared Executives Get $6 Million in Bonuses Approved by Judge [Deal Journal] $$$ Bernanke QE3 Stocks Miss Greenspan Irrational Exuberance [Bloomberg] $$$ ‘I’m Quite Concerned About Fiscal Cliff’: Greenspan [CNBC] $$$ Argentina won't kneel down before 'vulture funds,' says Cabinet Chief [BA Herald] $$$ Gupta is no Rajaratnam. Gupta tipped inside information about one company to Rajaratnam, while Rajaratnam traded on confidential information collected from many sources. So you’d expect that Gupta would be treated differently when he appears for sentencing. Federal sentencing guidelines, however, suggest a prison term for him that’s similar in length to the 11 years Rajaratnam is serving. And prosecutors want a sentence within those guidelines, just as they want for the hundreds of defendants sentenced in federal courts nationwide every day. Because what Gupta and Rajaratnam did is so different, though, sentencing Gupta to anything like the time Rajaratnam is serving undermines the whole purpose of the sentencing scheme that prosecutors say they want to uphold. [Slate] $$$ For several years now, Marc Lasry, the co-founder of Avenue Capital, has decorated his mansion on East 74th Street with bloodied bodies hanging from the balcony, skeleton heads, a giant inflatable ghost, swinging bats and a life-size, clothed skeleton affixed to a tree on the sidewalk. One afternoon last week, tourists and children gathered to take pictures of a dancing skeleton beside the front door. It was singing “Super Freak.” (Perhaps in the spirit of competition, the hedge fund manager Philip A. Falcone and his wife, Lisa Maria, have lavishly decorated the exterior of their 27,525-square-foot house on East 67th Street even though it is currently a construction site.) [NYT via BI] $$$ Adveq, a leading asset manager investing in private equity and real asset funds globally, is looking for an investor relations and development representative for North America [DBCC] $$$ Former Soros CIO nears launch of Anderson Global Macro early next year [AR] $$$ Wall Street Is Rethinking Commodity-Trading Role [WSJ] $$$ This is a story about LBO companies getting equity financing from long-only investors to pay down debt to manageable levels before an IPO [Term Sheet] $$$ This is a story about a management consultant who is also a self-published poet [BBW] $$$ "My wife ... penetrated to the heart of the debate in a single sentence tonight when, only about 15 minutes into the exchange, she observed: 'Romney’s flag pin is much larger than Obama’s flag pin.'" [NR] $$$ Obama Takes Out Romney With Mid-Debate Drone Attack [The Onion] $$$ NYC-Based Soup Chain Offers Free Cup of Soup, Personal Service from a ‘Cunt’ Named Mary [Gawker]

$$$ Schaeuble Declares Markets Wrong As Europe Heads To Vacation [Bloomberg] $$$ Don't Force Banks Into 'Draconian' Breakups: Whitney [CNBC] $$$ Morgan Stanley Stock May Be Worth $32 In Breakup, Mayo Says [Bloomberg] $$$ The Merkley plan to refinance underwater mortgages sounds pretty good [Reuters / Felix Salmon] $$$ Outspoken Analyst Kinnucan Pleads Guilty in Insider Case [WSJ] $$$ Man who rescued a 17-pound lobster "felt the nearly 100-year-old crustacean did not deserve to die with its parts soaked in butter. 'If he was 100, he saw World War I, World War II, man on the moon,' he said. 'Being in New England, he even saw the Red Sox win the World Series. So, he didn’t deserve the boiling water.'" [CBS] $$$ Due to recent regulatory requirements, a top bank in Charlotte is looking for a counterparty credit risk manager to be a Basel expert [DBCC] $$$ Libor scandal makes it more costly for bankers to get insured [Reuters] $$$ Europe Aims to Make Rate Manipulation a Criminal Offense [DealBook] $$$ Fund managers to lose securities lending profits [FT] $$$ The Securities and Exchange Commission drew sharp criticism from a federal judge who said they have failed to properly oversee a $55 million investor education fund created by a nearly decade-old settlement with Wall Street banks. The fund had been created as part of a roughly $1.5 billion regulatory accord in 2003 with Citigroup Inc, Goldman Sachs Group Inc, JPMorgan Chase & Co and other banks accused of publishing biased analyst research. U.S. District Judge William Pauley in Manhattan said the SEC has shown a "lack of oversight" and "indifference" toward how a nonprofit organization charged with distributing the money has been managed. ... Pauley pointed as an example to a two-year, $91,500 grant to the Genesee District Library in Flint, Michigan, that appeared to have resulted in just two events, one of which concerned "spending, sharing, and saving" for children ages two to five. "While there may be benefits to starting investor education early, toddlers seem beyond the pale," the judge wrote in an order issued Wednesday. [Reuters] $$$ Mitt Romney would restore 'Anglo-Saxon' relations between Britain and America [Telegraph]

$$$ Fed Is 'Playing a Game With Us:' Pimco's Gross [CNBC] $$$ Bundesbank steps up pressure on Draghi [FT] $$$ Broker departures accelerate at Merrill Lynch [Reuters] $$$ The head of credit trading at Credit Suisse has been fined £210,000 for disclosing confidential information about a forthcoming €2.5bn bond issue after inviting a UK fund manager to “play charades” and guess the identity of the issuer. Nicholas Kyprios encouraged a fund manager who had been invited by Credit Suisse to a roadshow in November 2009 for an unnamed company to guess the issuer, using phrases like “you’re getting warmer”, the Financial Services Authority said. [FT] $$$ How would you like to be a Fixed Income Business Management Analyst for BlackRock in New York? [DBCC] $$$ Goldman Hires a New P.R. Chief $$$ Euro Zone Split over Financial Transaction Tax [Der Spiegel] $$$ Fred Wilpon's lawyers have planned a whole range of distractions for their Madoff trial [WSJ, related] $$$ Robert Lacoursiere, the Paulson & Co. partner who oversaw the $23 billion hedge fund’s team of banking analysts, quit last week after four years to start his own fund, according to a person with knowledge of the matter. [Bloomberg] $$$ Manhattan madam's 'sidekick' turns herself in, released on $100K bail [NYP]