September 17, 2021

What Hank And Hal Steinbrenner Need To Ask Themselves Right About Is, Do We Want $3 Billion Deposited In Our Bank Account In A Friendly Manner Or Do We Want It Violently Shoved Down Our Throats?

Are the Yankees for sale? "Baseball and financial sources" say yes. People with the last name Steinbrenner say no. Perhaps the latter, though, just needs to meet the right buyer? A buyer who's got money to spend? A buyer who wants a Major League Baseball team so badly he can taste it? Who has so far bid on not one, not two, but three organizations in the last year? A buyer who  can do this the easy way or the hard way? He's going to get his hands on a team one way or another and the sooner people realize that the better. So everyone is preparped, when the Big Guy is running the show, the first order of business will be: a) Shitcan A-Rod b) Reassign A-Rod to clean SAC's offices c) Rehire Ping Jiang to discipline underperforming players d) Gather all Yankee employees and unleash four hour-long string of obscenities about garbage performance e) all of the above
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Are the Yankees for sale? "Baseball and financial sources" say yes. People with the last name Steinbrenner say no. Perhaps the latter, though, just needs to meet the right buyer? A buyer who's got money to spend? A buyer who wants a Major League Baseball team so badly he can taste it? A buyer who has so far bid on not one, not two, but three organizations in the last year? A buyer who can do this the easy way or the hard way?

He's going to get his hands on this team one way or another if it's the last thing he does and the sooner people realize that the better. It'll be a big change, of course, and so everyone is prepared, let's determine now what the very first order of business will be when the Big Guy is running the show. In pondering the question, remember that there will be a considerable amount of work to do in terms of whipping these noncontributing zeros into shape but he'll also be really excited to finally be an MLB owner and won't want to be too harsh too soon.

So, Day 1, 8:00AM, what happens:

a) Shitcan A-Rod
b) Rehire Ping Jiang to discipline underperforming players, of which there are many
c) Gather all (Yankee) employees on the field and unleash four hour-long string of obscenities about garbage performance
d) all of the above
e) write-in

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