Write-Offs: 07.30.12

$$$ ECB thinks the unthinkable, action likely weeks away [Reuters] $$$ Private equity assets hit record $3tn [FT] $$$ Economy Tests Harvard [WSJ] $$$ Guy seeks attention by pretending he manipulated Libor [Boston Review, related] $$$ Chivalry On Sinking Ships Only A Myth, Researchers Find [Bloomberg] $$$ Macquarie Research is looking for a REIT research associate in New York [DBCC] $$$ A Berlusconi Comeback Is Last Thing Italy Needs [Bloomberg] $$$ Here you will find a Fox Business segment on The Decathlon featuring an NBA vs. Wall Street vertical jump contest [FBN] $$$ Here you will find an argument for replacing the uncomfortable business metaphor "opening the kimono" with "putting a ruler to the dick" [Mathbabe] $$$ "Many scientists don’t like to talk about shark sex," but some do [LRB]

Author:: Dealbreaker
Updated:: Jan 14, 2019
Original:: Jul 30, 2012

$$$ECB thinks the unthinkable, action likely weeks away [Reuters]

$$$Private equity assets hit record $3tn [FT]

$$$Economy Tests Harvard [WSJ]

$$$ Guy seeks attention by pretending he manipulated Libor [Boston Review, related]

$$$Chivalry On Sinking Ships Only A Myth, Researchers Find [Bloomberg]

$$$ Macquarie Research is looking for a REIT research associate in New York [DBCC]

$$$A Berlusconi Comeback Is Last Thing Italy Needs [Bloomberg]

$$$ Here you will find a Fox Business segment on The Decathlon featuring an NBA vs. Wall Street vertical jump contest [FBN]

$$$ Here you will find an argument for replacing the uncomfortable business metaphor "opening the kimono" with "putting a ruler to the dick" [Mathbabe]

$$$ "Many scientists don’t like to talk about shark sex," but some do [LRB]

$$$ Inside a Star Hedge Fund: Lots of Big Bets, Built Fast [WSJ] $$$ Fed pushes banks to ignore rivals when setting bonuses [Reuters] $$$ JPMorgan Board Backs CEO Dimon as Chairman, Pays Zames More [Bloomberg] $$$ The Senate Drafts the SEC's Case Against JPMorgan [BBW] $$$ "A J.P. Morgan Chase employee climbed onstage at a black-tie dinner held on Wall Street Thursday night and accepted an award on behalf of the embattled bank for 'best crisis management.' ... Kathy Hu, an executive director in J.P. Morgan’s investor relations department, accepted the award and quipped: 'Can I just say, "Crisis? What crisis?"' J.P. Morgan beat out nominees Chevron Corp., which struggled with a refinery fire last year, and St. Jude Medical Inc., which battled heart-device problems." [Deal Journal] $$$ Pope calls Argentine kiosk owner to cancel paper delivery [CNA] $$$ Hey, Let Harvard Alumni Have Their Fun This Morning [DI] $$$ Deutsche Bank mulls raising fixed pay to counter EU bonus rules [Reuters] $$$ Judges’ Spat Strikes a Chord Among Deal Makers [DealBook] $$$ "Now some distressed debt investors get to find out what exactly it is you buy when you buy American-issued debt in a company incorporated in the Cayman Islands and doing business in China. I suspect the answer will be 'not much.'" [DealBook] $$$ "Henry Blodget is, in all seriousness, an artist of the internet whose methods should be studied and analyzed for future generations." [Gawker] $$$ "Finally I should note that the rectal gonorrhoea is the reason for my odour." Investment research! [Bronte Capital]

$$$ S&P 500 Breaks Record [WSJ] $$$ M&A Stumbles Amid March Deal Drought [Bloomberg] $$$ An interview with Athanasios Orphanides: What happened in Cyprus [Economist] $$$ Sarkozy: from the Elysée to private equity [FT] $$$ Embattled DOE-Grant Recipient Changes Name from A123 to B456 [WFB] $$$ Posting will be light tomorrow for Good Friday. Enjoy the holiday; we'll see you back here on Monday. $$$ Dell paying Blackstone's bills [Fortune] $$$ Investors sue RBS over 2008 rights issue [FT] $$$ REITs Trigger Fed Warning as Kain Tops $100 Billion [Bloomberg] $$$ Citi Sails Back Into 'Synthetic' Securities [WSJ] $$$ New York Is ‘By Far the Least Free State’ in America, According to Some People [DI] $$$ THE OTHER SIDE OF THE GITMO STRIKE: Detainees Are Treated Absurdly Well Compared To Business Insider Reporters [BI]

$$$ Here are Dick Fuld's call logs from March through September of 2008. Tim Geithner, Hank Paulson, Lloyd Blankfein, Jamie Dimon, Ken Lewis, Rodge Cohen, Raj Rajaratnam ... [Jenner] $$$ The quants and derivatives traders of Occupy Wall Street [WaPo] $$$ Spain in talks over ‘bad bank’ scheme [FT] $$$ [@JeffMacke] $$$ Duke University grad doesn't want to waste her unique talents working on Wall Street, works in management consulting instead [DealBook, earlier] $$$ A leading M&A boutique is looking for a class of 2011 or 2010 FIG associate [DBCC] $$$ Large layoffs loom on Wall Street [Fortune] $$$ SEC Charges Mother, Daughter, and Their Attorney in Illegal Penny Stock Scheme [SEC] $$$ Barnes & Noble’s Nook Unit Is Worth More Than Its Parent Company [DealBook] $$$ “If mortgage REITs were not delivering to investors they would not be in a position to raise capital. Last I checked, the United States was still a capitalist country despite efforts to the contrary.” This quote from the CEO of mortgage REIT Annaly is not encouraging [Bloomberg] $$$ "But the debate between Krugman and Paul on Bloomberg TV this afternoon was more awkward than awesome, like a special episode of the Sopranos with the character of Tobias Funke." [DI] $$$ This novel by a former Lehman MD begins "The weight of the cufflinks was palpable." [Fiction Studio]

$$$ JPMorgan Said To Face Escalating Senate Probe Of CIO Loss [Bloomberg] $$$ J.P. Morgan Names New Chief Investment Officer [Deal Journal] $$$ Banks now like to do quarterly calls with bondholders [WSJ] $$$ Some people still like big banks [Bloomberg] $$$ FINRA is suing a test-prep firm for taking Series 7, etc., exams 64 times, failing 52 of those times, and memorizing the questions to tell their students [Reuters; the complaint is also amusing] $$$ [Harvard] Economics concentrator Ali E. Evans ’13 received his [Harvard Business School] acceptance email on Wednesday while sitting in class next to his roommates. He said he celebrated silently and texted his parents. Evans said he has visited classes at the Business School with his tutors at Kirkland House since sophomore year. "Leading my own company one day is definitely a goal of mine, and so business school definitely fits in with that plan," he said. [Crimson] $$$ Pimco is looking for a diversity & inclusion coordinator in Newport Beach [DBCC] $$$ Qatar Imperils Big Merger of Commodity Companies [DealBook] $$$ There's a new Kindle Fire and it's cheaper [WSJ] $$$ Citigroup, Goldman, UBS Sued Over Mortgage-Backed Bonds [Bloomberg] $$$ Goldman must face mortgage debt claims - 2nd Circuit [Reuters] $$$ European political leader says "Some fans of group sex say that it’s better than one-on-one because, as with any collective work, you can skive off," is not Silvio Berlusconi [Telegraph]

$$$ Fed Extends Twist, Signals Concerns [WSJ] $$$ Reasons to be sad about the Fed [Tim Duy] $$$ Berlusconi Casts Doubt on Austerity Plan [WSJ] $$$ Rompuy Blueprint Said To Include Options On Debt, Bank Oversight [Bloomberg] $$$ Standstills in Change of Control Transactions [HLS] $$$ With all words from Greek, Roman, Norse, etc. myths already taken, Peter Thiel named a fund after a metal from The Lord of the Rings [DI] $$$ A leading New York hedge fund is looking for a general counsel - could it be you? [DBCC] $$$ Regulators Back Off Tougher Curbs on Oil [WSJ] $$$ Ex-Orioles player Eddie Murray is part of insider trading inquiry [Reuters] $$$ The Mormon Madoff: How Shawn Merriman Scammed Millions $$$ NYSE CEO: Public Has Lost Trust inMarket [WSJ] $$$ Madam still stuck at Rikers [NYP]

$$$ Facebook Adds Citi, Credit Suisse, Deutsche Bank on IPO [Bloomberg] $$$ Goldman CEO Blankfein deposed in insider case [Reuters] $$$ Greek Official Warns Debt Holdouts [DealBook] $$$ Yelp Stock Price Jumps 60 Percent In Its Debut [CNBC] $$$ Here is a fashion writer's detailed critique of Dominique Strauss-Kahn's lawyer's claim that it's hard to recognize a naked prostitute [Slate, earlier] $$$ You could be a Senior Director covering REITS for Fitch Ratings [DBCC] $$$ Iceland is considering adopting the Canadian dollar [Globe and Mail] $$$ U.S. seeks dismissal of Hank Greenberg's lawsuit on AIG takeover [Reuters] $$$ John Lanchester talks about why there's so little fiction about money [FT] $$$ And when making such comparisons between economics and physical science, there’s yet another point: what we call “microfoundations” are not like physical laws. Heck, they’re not even true. Maximizing consumers are just a metaphor, possibly useful in making sense of behavior, but possibly not. [Paul Krugman] $$$ Hoboken Steels for Wave of Drunken Revelers [Bloomberg] $$$ "You can all start creating a beautiful grey market now. Enjoy the weekend." [Overheard]

$$$ Argentina to Seize Control of Oil Firm [WSJ] $$$ World Bank picks Kim as next head [FT] $$$ Coty Tries to Rally Support for Avon Bid Amid Skepticism [DealBook] $$$ Brazil Cannibal Empanadas: Brazilian Women Murdered, Eaten And Made Into Human Pastries [HuffPo, congrats on the Pulitzer] $$$ PIMCO is looking to fill tax manager positions - in regulated and private funds - in Newport Beach [DBCC] $$$ New York Jets All-Pro D'Brickashaw Ferguson, will be on Wall Street (Exchange Place and Broad Street) at 3:45pm tomorrow as part of The Decathlon 2012. Ferguson will be demonstrating how The Decathlon uses performance-based donating ('charitybets') to raise money to support Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. He'll be charitybetting on any Wall Streeter to come out and participate in a Vertical Jump contest. Ferguson will have a Vertec (devise used at the NFL Combine to test vertical leaping) and a few thousand dollars - CASH - to donate to MSKCC. Jump 24-inches, Ferguson donates $100. Jump $26-inches, Ferguson donates $200. And so on and so forth. Registration for The Decathlon 2012 opens Tuesday, April 17th. The event is on Sunday, July 29th at Columbia University's Wien Stadium. $$$ For Two Economists, the Buffett Rule Is Just a Start [NYT] $$$ Following Other People's Stock Picks Just Got Easier but why? [Bloomberg] $$$ What is Carney talking about? [Reuters / Ben Walsh] $$$ ECB staff demand inflation protection [Money Supply] $$$ Rock Out With Your Cock Out: Penis Warmers Are Now a Thing [Fashionista] $$$ Breasts lead to arrest of Anonymous hacker [CNET]

$$$ Overheating in Credit Markets: Origins, Measurement, and Policy Responses [Fed, also Free Exchange] $$$ Justice Department, states weigh action against Moody's [Reuters] $$$ Apple Jumps After Saying in Discussions to Return Cash [Bloomberg] $$$ Christie Conditionally Backs New Jersey Internet Gambling [WSJ] $$$ "Italian Prime Minister Mario Monti was presented with a small white dog he dubbed Empatia during an appearance on a TV program. ... Bignardi then asked Monti if he would also like to adopt a dog and brought out the small mixed-breed canine. Monti said holding the fluffy dog felt 'magnificently good.'" [UPI] $$$ Cohen & Steers is looking for a US REITs research associate in New York [DBCC] $$$ "Last October, certain Dell employees were forced to sell some of their company stock at just $9.55 per share. Now the company is being sold to founder Michael Dell for $13.65 per share." [Fortune] $$$ K.K.R.’s Profit Jumps 22% on Investment Gains [DealBook] $$$ Ackman to Herbalife: You’re Not the Girl Scouts [DealBook] $$$ Generic Brand Cat Can't Hide His Disappointment [Copyranter]