$$$ Greek Aid Payment Call Won’t Be Made Next Week, EU Official Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Dexia Gets a New Bailout [DealBook] $$$ Obama Victory Leads Wealthy to Make Quick Pre-2013 Moves [Bloomberg] $$$ "The ECB is playing a more complicated game than old fashioned 'loose money to counteract downturns, tight money to counteract inflation' monetary policy. And you have to ask yourself: Is it working? Has this delivered prosperity?" [Slate / Matt Yglesias] $$$ The guy who was going to fire all of his employees if Obama got elected, gave them a 5% raise [BBW] $$$ Priceline.com Impulsively Buys Kayak During Mini Existential Crisis [VF] $$$ JPMorgan is looking for a high-net-worth banker in Chicago [DBCC] $$$ JPMorgan Cleared for $3 Billion Stock Buyback [DealBook] $$$ Libor rates cull proposed for April [FT] $$$ Consulting Firm That Once Advised Gadhafi Enters Chapter 11 [WSJ] $$$ Here you will find a review of Atlas Shrugged [The Awl] $$$ "As he wended his way toward proposing an April trial date for Christopher's claims and Tory's counterclaims, Strine reflected on the (in his view) unwarranted popularity of 'duck boots,' the mysterious utility of the Topsiders his son just bought and the strangely bright colors of WASP-preferred styles." [Reuters] $$$ "'Paying bills,' Mr. Adelson said on Tuesday night when asked by a Norwegian reporter how he thought his donations had been spent. 'That’s how you spend money. Either that or become a Jewish husband — you spend a lot of money.'" [DI]

$$$ Goldman Banker Probed for Alleged Leaks to Galleon [WSJ] $$$ S&P cuts Spain ratings two notches to BBB-plus [Reuters] $$$ "AIG May Not Be As Healthy As It Looks" [Bloomberg] $$$ The Telus proxy fight is amazing [DealBook] $$$ Legalizing Spousal Necrophilia in Egypt, but only for the first six hours [Volokh Conspiracy] $$$ Morgan Stanley is looking for a VP of Corporate Tax in Chicago - maybe you? [DBCC] $$$ Relax, America, the Bacon Crisis Has Passed [CNBC] $$$ CEO pay is inflated by faulty comp sets [Bloomberg] $$$ A strange data point on flows vs. inventories [FTAV] $$$ Bank bailouts, hedge funds, and foreign sovereign immunity [Economist] $$$ "We do not accept claims for elbow licking." [The Hairpin] $$$ Here is a baby anteater named Corndog hugging a stuffed animal [ZooBorns]

$$$ Spain Banks Have $76 Billion Capital Deficit in Stress Test [Bloomberg] $$$ How Bernanke Pulled the Fed His Way [WSJ] $$$ The economics of video games [Wonkblog] $$$ Scaramucci Picking Singapore Shows City as Hot Spot [Bloomberg] $$$ "SocGen’s Alberts concedes that his writing can be 'pretty insane' and his market timing 'unerringly inaccurate.'" CNBC's headline is "Bernanke’s ‘Ruinous’ QE Will Lead to Rapid Inflation: SocGen’s Albert Edwards" [CNBC] $$$ 'Cocaine For Snowblindness': What Polar Explorers Packed For First Aid [NPR] $$$ AIG is looking for a credit analyst in New York [DBCC] $$$ Mortgage lending should provide a tailwind to bank earnings [Reuters] $$$ Ex-analyst at unit of Cohen's SAC Capital admits insider trading [Reuters] $$$ Global regulators follow UK’s Libor lead [FT] $$$ What Your Beer Says About Your Politics [Hotline] $$$ From King’s Daughter to Lowly Fishmonger: Lisa Marie Presley Is Selling Fish and Chips out of the Back of a Van [Gawker]

$$$ U.S. investigates whether JPMorgan traders hid losses [Reuters] $$$ Was JPMorgan's restatement actually an elaborate plot to get Ina Drew's comp clawed back? No? [Felix Salmon] $$$ Fed May Need To Begin New Asset Purchases, Lockhart Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Ex-Mets star Dykstra pleads guilty in bankruptcy fraud case [NYP] $$$ "You have to sit there in silence, and you just get up every day and beat your head against the wall," but for that (and ratting out Countrywide) they'll pay you $14.5 million [Reuters] $$$ Q&A: The Gourmand Behind New York's $666 'Douche Burger' [BW] $$$ Deutsche Bank is looking for a VP-level Group Finance COO business manager [DBCC] $$$ Spanish Bank Borrowing from ECB Surges [WSJ] $$$ Italy sells debt despite downgrade [FT] $$$ Visa, MasterCard in $6 Billion Settlement Over Surcharges [WSJ] $$$ Wealthy Homeowners Brace for 'Mansion Cliff' [CNBC!] $$$ Attention Cable and Satellite Subscribers: This Network Is Being Dropped Because Your Provider Is Being a Giant Douche [McSweeney's]

$$$ Stocks Near New Heights as Small Investors Regain Faith [NYT] $$$ J.P. Morgan Risk Officer Taking Leave of Absence [WSJ] $$$ Soros Says Hedge Funds Can’t Beat Market Because of Fees [Bloomberg] $$$ UBS Chairman proposes industry-wide settlement over Libor [Reuters] $$$ "One explanation for the confusion is that many things that are considered normal in finance look like fraud to almost everyone else." [Free Exchange] $$$ Outcry Over Bid to Make Water Cheaper Than Beer [WSJ] $$$ An investment management firm is looking for a senior investment associate to research credit hedge funds in D.C. [DBCC] $$$ Europe's Banks Rush to Repay ECB Funds [WSJ] $$$ U.S. Court Ruling Threatens Consumer Bureau Decisions [Bloomberg] $$$ Italy's Monte Paschi faces shareholder fury as scandal widens [Reuters] $$$ You may be surprised to learn that "the president and chairman of Mortgage Xpress, Inc. (subsequently renamed The Alternative Energy Technology Center, Inc.)" was sued by the SEC [SEC] $$$ Cory Booker Continues His Steady March Toward Canonization by Personally Saving a Stranded Dog from Freezing to Death [Gawker]

$$$ Ex-UBS Traders Offered Deal by U.S. in Rate Probe [WSJ] $$$ The history of the invention of Libor [Reuters] $$$ British MPs accuse US of anti-City agenda [FT] $$$ Why investors should avoid hedge funds [Reuters / Felix Salmon] $$$ "Brazilian central bank employees staged their first work stoppage in five years today ... demanding an average pay increase of 23 percent to compensate for inflation since June 2008." [Bloomberg via Slate] $$$ Pole Vaulter Realizes It’s Not His Day As His Pole Shatters Mid-Vault [Deadspin] $$$ J.P. Morgan is looking for a Java developer to work on interest rates derivatives pricing [DBCC] $$$ Carbon Credits Gone Awry Raise Output of Harmful Gas [NYT] $$$ "I propose an expanded system of company registration under which companies would have to trade in private markets for a seasoning period, with mandatory disclosure, before they would be allowed to sell their shares to the public at large." [Harvard Law] $$$ On retail vs. institutional investors: "As for small investors vs. little guys, there’s a difference. If you have enough money that you’re investing it through brokers, I personally don’t count you as small, even if you appear small to Goldman Sachs." [Mathbabe] $$$ A Hundred Horses Are Ford’s Pride After Flipping Tainted Banks is really a Bloomberg headline [Bloomberg] $$$ Beck's next album will be released only as sheet music [McSweeney's]

$$$ Greek left attacks ‘barbarous’ austerity [FT] $$$ Facebook Facebook Facebook Facebook [WSJ/FT/CNBC/Reuters] $$$ Freddie Mac Chooses CEO [WSJ] $$$ After McClendon's trades, Chesapeake board gave blessing [Reuters] $$$ Tim Sykes is still doing things [BetaBeat, earlier] $$$ "A bank robbery, in our imagination, provides the robber with a one-off high-risk opportunity to become incredibly wealthy, in comparatively guilt-free fashion: No one but the corporation loses any money, so, what the fuck? That used to be the case, but due to inflation — as well as a host of other factors — it no longer is." [The Billfold] $$$ CIBC Global Asset Management is looking for a high yield VP in Toronto [DBCC] $$$ House Republicans are complaining that the Fed is helping the economy too much, causing House Republicans not to want to help the economy [Real Time Economics] $$$ Could a Stock ETF Cloak Its Portfolio? [WSJ] $$$ Green Mountain Chairman Replaced After Stock Sales [WSJ] $$$ Nomura is growing headcount [Bloomberg] $$$ “It lived alongside our ancestors, and it probably ate them,” said Christopher Brochu, an associate professor of geoscience at the University of Iowa and a study author. “We don’t actually have fossil human remains with croc bites, but the crocs were bigger than today’s crocodiles, and we were smaller, so there probably wasn’t much biting involved.” [Bloomberg]

$$$ Lawsuits cast darker shadow over banks than Libor fines [Reuters] $$$ Majority of Wealthy Support Taxing Themselves: Poll [CNBC] $$$ NRA Calls for Armed Guards in Schools to Prevent Killings [Bloomberg] $$$ ICE Would Owe $750 Million if NYSE Deal Blocked [WSJ] $$$ Daily Intel is live-blogging the Mayan apocalypse [DI] $$$ That's it for us today. We'll be on a light schedule next week, and will see you back here full time on January 2nd. Happy holidays! $$$ BoNY Mellon is looking for a wealth management sales director in Boston [DBCC] $$$ Swaps ‘Armageddon’ Lingers as New Rules Concentrate Risk [Bloomberg] $$$ New York Fed: Progress Being Made in Improving Tri-Party Repo Sector [RTE] $$$ "[C]lass actions are more closely associated with unreliable disclosures than are SEC investigations. Moreover, stand-alone class actions appear more likely to result in settlements, and those settlements are of greater magnitude, than stand-alone SEC investigations, and officers are more likely to be terminated. Our findings cast doubt on the claim that SEC investigations are superior to class actions in targeting fraud and imposing sanctions on companies." [Harvard Law] $$$ "Plaintiff's counsel hereby gives notice he will not be available any time after December 21, 2012, due to the end of the world." [ATL]