$$$ S&P 500 Breaks Record [WSJ] $$$ M&A Stumbles Amid March Deal Drought [Bloomberg] $$$ An interview with Athanasios Orphanides: What happened in Cyprus [Economist] $$$ Sarkozy: from the Elysée to private equity [FT] $$$ Embattled DOE-Grant Recipient Changes Name from A123 to B456 [WFB] $$$ Posting will be light tomorrow for Good Friday. Enjoy the holiday; we'll see you back here on Monday. $$$ Dell paying Blackstone's bills [Fortune] $$$ Investors sue RBS over 2008 rights issue [FT] $$$ REITs Trigger Fed Warning as Kain Tops $100 Billion [Bloomberg] $$$ Citi Sails Back Into 'Synthetic' Securities [WSJ] $$$ New York Is ‘By Far the Least Free State’ in America, According to Some People [DI] $$$ THE OTHER SIDE OF THE GITMO STRIKE: Detainees Are Treated Absurdly Well Compared To Business Insider Reporters [BI]

$$$ Facebook to List on Nasdaq [WSJ] $$$ Egan-Jones Cuts US Credit Rating to 'AA,' Citing Debt [CNBC] $$$ Swiss Are Tested on Franc [WSJ] $$$ Jefferies Ends First Quarter With Short Position on Spain [Bloomberg] $$$ ABS shows Greek bonds can pay par [IFR] $$$ Hyenas Give Up Scavenging For Lent [LiveScience via The Hairpin, related?] $$$ Like the NYSE, we’ll be off tomorrow. Enjoy the long weekend and we'll see you Monday. $$$ Jobs News Could Be So Good That It's Bad. Or vice versa? [WSJ] $$$ Architect of Fed’s ‘Operation Twist’ quits [FT] $$$ Kozlowski Is Turned Down for Parole [DealBook] $$$ The Vulcan/Martin Marietta takeover fight is pretty nasty [Dealpolitik] $$$ Why You Should Learn to Love Pink Slime [The Atlantic / Adam Ozimek] $$$ Beer is not the main cause of the the beer belly [Guardian]

$$$ U.K. Loses Top Aaa Rating From Moody’s as Growth Weakens [Bloomberg] $$$ Panic-driven austerity in the Eurozone and its implications [VoxEU] $$$ Judge extends freeze on account linked to Heinz trades [Reuters] $$$ "I asked ... if Citigroup had a policy of providing financial incentives to senior executives to encourage them to seek high-level federal jobs." [Bloomberg] $$$ "The bankrupt city of San Bernardino has hired a new city manager who, according to court filings, has twice declared personal bankruptcy ..." [Reuters] $$$ Pope Also Abandoning 1.5 Million People on Twitter [DI] $$$ Macquarie is looking for a structuring and risk management analyst for its energy markets division in Houston [DBCC] $$$ “Herbalife is bound by our self-regulatory code that prohibits [crimes]. Obviously, they wouldn’t be members of the association if we believed they were in violation.” [DealBook] $$$ Societe Generale planning CVA securitisation [Reuters] $$$ Don't Fix It, Call It a Risk Factor! [Credit Slips] $$$ Ex-SEC officials to risk council: Back off on money funds [Reuters] $$$ Resume includes "Drug dealer 2003-2005 small time supplier" [Gawker]

$$$ Dell Founder Said to Weigh Switching to Blackstone Offer [DealBook] $$$ Mortgage Securitizers Didn’t Know Housing Was Going Bust [WSJ] $$$ The case for Cypriot national equity [FTAV] $$$ BRICS Nations Plan New Bank to Bypass World Bank, IMF [Bloomberg] $$$ "Nestled in the shadow of the picturesque southern mountain range Macgillycuddy’s Reeks, home to Ireland’s three highest peaks, Kilgarvan is little more than a blink-and-you-miss-it blip on the busy road between the tourist towns of Killarney and Kenmare," but now you can drive drunk there [NYT] $$$ Sorry for today's technical difficulties. We expect things will be better tomorrow. If they're not, we'll probably be at Dealbroken, so check there too. $$$ Dudley gives first hints of slowing QE3 [FT] $$$ Bernanke Rejects Currency War Charges [WSJ] $$$ "Perhaps if we paid more money we’d have skilled associates." Instead you have bill padding. [DealBook] $$$ Tesla's Elon Musk tweets about big announcement for Thursday [CNET] $$$ "Hiring Richard Fuld is potentially so hazardous, he requires his own risk factor." [Overheard] $$$ The Most Expensive T-Shirt in New York City Costs $91,500.00 [The Awl]

$$$ Argentina to Seize Control of Oil Firm [WSJ] $$$ World Bank picks Kim as next head [FT] $$$ Coty Tries to Rally Support for Avon Bid Amid Skepticism [DealBook] $$$ Brazil Cannibal Empanadas: Brazilian Women Murdered, Eaten And Made Into Human Pastries [HuffPo, congrats on the Pulitzer] $$$ PIMCO is looking to fill tax manager positions - in regulated and private funds - in Newport Beach [DBCC] $$$ New York Jets All-Pro D'Brickashaw Ferguson, will be on Wall Street (Exchange Place and Broad Street) at 3:45pm tomorrow as part of The Decathlon 2012. Ferguson will be demonstrating how The Decathlon uses performance-based donating ('charitybets') to raise money to support Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. He'll be charitybetting on any Wall Streeter to come out and participate in a Vertical Jump contest. Ferguson will have a Vertec (devise used at the NFL Combine to test vertical leaping) and a few thousand dollars - CASH - to donate to MSKCC. Jump 24-inches, Ferguson donates $100. Jump $26-inches, Ferguson donates $200. And so on and so forth. Registration for The Decathlon 2012 opens Tuesday, April 17th. The event is on Sunday, July 29th at Columbia University's Wien Stadium. $$$ For Two Economists, the Buffett Rule Is Just a Start [NYT] $$$ Following Other People's Stock Picks Just Got Easier but why? [Bloomberg] $$$ What is Carney talking about? [Reuters / Ben Walsh] $$$ ECB staff demand inflation protection [Money Supply] $$$ Rock Out With Your Cock Out: Penis Warmers Are Now a Thing [Fashionista] $$$ Breasts lead to arrest of Anonymous hacker [CNET]