$$$ Citigroup Boys' Club Highlights Industry Gender Gap [AB] $$$ Bernie Madoff reveals that merger arbitrage is often insider trading and other secrets of the 1980s [CNBC] $$$ The National Futures Association is trying to figure out how to catch the next Peregrine Financial fraud by asking Peregrine Financial [WSJ] $$$ JPMorgan Said to Face Order to Tighten Money-Laundering Controls [Bloomberg] $$$ You can email Mark Zuckerberg for $100 [Mashable] $$$ Registration for the 5th annual Decathlon starts Tuesday, January 22! This year's competition takes place on July 28th, and also includes monthly “Throw Downs” where all registered Decathletes compete in 1-2 Decathlon events and collect charity bets on head-to-head match-ups (40 yard dash! Pull-ups! Bench press!). All proceeds benefit the Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. $$$ A hedge fund is looking for a junior equities relationship manager in Manhattan [DBCC] $$$ FrontPoint veteran's Copia Capital liquidates all funds, readies rebirth [AR] $$$ Don’t worry about an Elliott vs Argentina precedent [Reuters / Felix Salmon] $$$ Why exchanges should be forced to use open source software [Jayanth Varma] $$$ Chicken Wing Prices Take Flight to Record High [Bloomberg] $$$ Dog teaches puppy how to go down stairs [Gawker]

$$$ Fed Is 'Playing a Game With Us:' Pimco's Gross [CNBC] $$$ Bundesbank steps up pressure on Draghi [FT] $$$ Broker departures accelerate at Merrill Lynch [Reuters] $$$ The head of credit trading at Credit Suisse has been fined £210,000 for disclosing confidential information about a forthcoming €2.5bn bond issue after inviting a UK fund manager to “play charades” and guess the identity of the issuer. Nicholas Kyprios encouraged a fund manager who had been invited by Credit Suisse to a roadshow in November 2009 for an unnamed company to guess the issuer, using phrases like “you’re getting warmer”, the Financial Services Authority said. [FT] $$$ How would you like to be a Fixed Income Business Management Analyst for BlackRock in New York? [DBCC] $$$ Goldman Hires a New P.R. Chief $$$ Euro Zone Split over Financial Transaction Tax [Der Spiegel] $$$ Fred Wilpon's lawyers have planned a whole range of distractions for their Madoff trial [WSJ, related] $$$ Robert Lacoursiere, the Paulson & Co. partner who oversaw the $23 billion hedge fund’s team of banking analysts, quit last week after four years to start his own fund, according to a person with knowledge of the matter. [Bloomberg] $$$ Manhattan madam's 'sidekick' turns herself in, released on $100K bail [NYP]

$$$ J.C. Penney Ousts Ron Johnson, Rehires Myron Ullman [WSJ] $$$ Capital markets: Is Citi the new golden child of Wall Street? [Euromoney] $$$ White Confirmed as SEC Chairman [WSJ] $$$ A.I.G. Seeks to Bar Greenberg From Suing U.S. on Its Behalf [DealBook] $$$ David Stockman's dystopia [Fortune] $$$ Wrestling’s Private Equity Champion [DealBook] $$$ Google Glass Already Being Banned from Strip Clubs [BetaBeat] $$$ The Fine Line Between Political Intelligence and Insider Trading [DealBook] $$$ Hedge Funds Wagering on Fannie Reincarnation [Bloomberg] $$$ As Deadline Looms, Few Companies Sign Up to Trade Swaps [WSJ] $$$ Costs of derivatives clearing stack up for buy-side [Reuters] $$$ Volcker: Central banks are too aggressive [CNN] $$$ Market Crash Likelihood Goes Up If Stocks Continue to Rally: Marc Faber [CNBC] $$$ Science proves women like men with bigger penises [NBC]

$$$ Argentina to Seize Control of Oil Firm [WSJ] $$$ World Bank picks Kim as next head [FT] $$$ Coty Tries to Rally Support for Avon Bid Amid Skepticism [DealBook] $$$ Brazil Cannibal Empanadas: Brazilian Women Murdered, Eaten And Made Into Human Pastries [HuffPo, congrats on the Pulitzer] $$$ PIMCO is looking to fill tax manager positions - in regulated and private funds - in Newport Beach [DBCC] $$$ New York Jets All-Pro D'Brickashaw Ferguson, will be on Wall Street (Exchange Place and Broad Street) at 3:45pm tomorrow as part of The Decathlon 2012. Ferguson will be demonstrating how The Decathlon uses performance-based donating ('charitybets') to raise money to support Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. He'll be charitybetting on any Wall Streeter to come out and participate in a Vertical Jump contest. Ferguson will have a Vertec (devise used at the NFL Combine to test vertical leaping) and a few thousand dollars - CASH - to donate to MSKCC. Jump 24-inches, Ferguson donates $100. Jump $26-inches, Ferguson donates $200. And so on and so forth. Registration for The Decathlon 2012 opens Tuesday, April 17th. The event is on Sunday, July 29th at Columbia University's Wien Stadium. $$$ For Two Economists, the Buffett Rule Is Just a Start [NYT] $$$ Following Other People's Stock Picks Just Got Easier but why? [Bloomberg] $$$ What is Carney talking about? [Reuters / Ben Walsh] $$$ ECB staff demand inflation protection [Money Supply] $$$ Rock Out With Your Cock Out: Penis Warmers Are Now a Thing [Fashionista] $$$ Breasts lead to arrest of Anonymous hacker [CNET]

$$$ You can still drink big sodas [NYP] $$$ Bank compensation up in 2012 despite cutback efforts [Reuters] $$$ Morgan Stanley Set to Name Kaminsky Brokerage Vice Chair [FBN] $$$ Mary Schapiro Is Nominated to G.E. Board [DealBook] $$$ The life cycle of the investment banker [TED] $$$ City high-flier 'was called crazy Miss Cokehead by work bullies after she blew whistle on insider dealing' [DM] $$$ Brookfield Investment Management is looking for a global infrastructure securities analyst in Chicago [DBCC] $$$ Europe trading tax would kill repo market -industry official [Reuters] $$$ SAC Capital Manager’s Tipper Deserves Prison, U.S. Says [Bloomberg] $$$ "Long term shareholders are well served by activism" [Aswath Damodaran] $$$ "Callan hardly needs advice from me but I'll offer it anyway. She may want to consider that her lack of satisfaction with her life's direction is not a product of the choices she made. Instead, her choices may have been a product of her lack of satisfaction. In my experience, the kind of people who can rise to the level she did at a relatively early age tend to be filling a hole in their psyche, an indistinguishable yearning for something more that is experienced as a kind of pain." [NetNet / John Carney] $$$ Corey Robin went to school with Bill[y] Ackman [Corey Robin]

$$$ Fed Officials Weigh More Stimulus, Minutes Show [WSJ] $$$ Investors get lowest-ever Treasury yields [FT] $$$ Spain steps up austerity amid protests [FT] $$$ San Bernardino becomes third California city seeking bankruptcy [Reuters] $$$ Wall Street Recruiter Suing the City After Being Arrested for Giving Cops the Finger [NYO] $$$ Financier Leon Black Is Mystery Buyer of 'The Scream' [WSJ] $$$ Russell Investment Group is looking for a head of fixed income research in Seattle or London [DBCC] $$$ CME to Open Fund Set Up After MF Global for Peregrine Clients [Deal Journal] $$$ SEC approves database plan to audit stock trades [Reuters] $$$ Silvio Berlusconi set to run again to become Italian prime minister [Telegraph] $$$ Romney Says He’ll Release 2011 Tax Return When It’s Ready [Bloomberg] $$$ Crazy Clause in McDonald’s’ Olympics Sponsorship Deal Bans All Other Vendors From Selling French Fries to Attendees [Gawker]

$$$ Instead Of Doing His Job, Jeroen Dijsselbloem Has Given Us A Glimpse Of The Euro 'End Game' [BI] $$$ Paul Krugman thinks Cyprus should leave the Euro [NYT] $$$ RBS Split Not Ruled Out [WSJ] $$$ "Big Bank CEOs Must Rally Against Breakup Talk" [AB] $$$ "Texas, the Germany of America." [WaPo] $$$ Aspiring Model Scores State-Funded Boob Job After Convincing Doctor Her Flat Chest Was Causing Her ‘Emotional Distress’ [Gawker] $$$ Global pool of triple A status shrinks 60% [FT] $$$ Denmark Reviews Bail-In Law as ‘Terrorists’ Shape Banking [Bloomberg] $$$ Two Charged in Insider-Trading Case [WSJ] $$$ How the ‘London Whale’ trade could have been stopped [RWC&G] $$$ Ranking All 27 Seasons of The Real World [Vulture] $$$ Trump loses fight against wind farm [FT]

$$$ Ben Bernanke is pretty sure the thing he's doing is not a horrible idea [FRB] $$$ Four Charged in U.K. Insider-Trading Probe [WSJ] $$$ Hedge Fund Jana Partners Takes Aim at Agrium [WSJ] $$$ In Goldman Programmer Case, a Way Around Double Jeopardy [DealBook] $$$ "The idea is that while equity owners - management - are like owners of call options on the assets of a firm (aka the Merton Model), banks are like down-and-out call option owners, because if their book equity goes down too far they will be forced into a fire-sale or liquidated by regulators. This is a barrier option, and has the interesting property that its vega - the derivative of the value of the equity with respect to asset volatility - is negative when it gets close in value to its barrier." [Falkenblog] $$$ Looking at cats on the internet makes you more productive at playing games on the internet [Wonkblog] $$$ Shia LaBeouf rescues sea lion [tv3.ie] $$$ Citi Capital Advisors is looking for a director of hedge funds risk management in New York [DBCC] $$$ DVA, one half of Dealbreaker will miss you [WSJ] $$$ LIBOR may converge with CD rates [Sober Look] $$$ Equity Trading and the Allocation of Market Data Revenue [FRB] $$$ "A Miami-bound American Airlines flight made an emergency landing at JFK when a row of passenger seats became unbolted and dangerously slid around like a carnival ride ..." [NYP] $$$ In urban Taiwan, indoor shrimp fishing is booming [LAT] $$$ "Queens teacher suing city claiming he was beaten up by a first-grader"; the pictures are superb [NYP]