$$$ Author of the spectacularly wrong ‘Dow 36,000′ has new thoughts on the stock market [Wonkblog] $$$ Fitch Downgrades Italy's Credit Ratings [WSJ] $$$ SEC: Goldman cannot ignore proposal to split chairman, CEO roles [Reuters] $$$ Talk of US high-yield 'bubble' is overdone [Reuters] $$$ "Even as some venture-capital firms have become skittish after the disappointing initial public offerings of Facebook, Groupon Inc. and Zynga Inc. - all of which were venture-backed — a number of hedge funds, private-equity firms and other asset-management firms are pouring money into closely held startups." [WSJ] $$$ George W. Bush’s Art Teacher Says He’s Painted 50 Dogs [Gawker] $$$ A boutique multi-strategy hedge fund in San Francisco is looking for a C++ programmer to help build an HFT platform [DBCC] $$$ AIG to Redeem $1.1 Billion of Debt in Path to Dividend [Bloomberg] $$$ "The Fed said the median loss from commercial and industrial loans across the 18 banks tested would be 6.5 percent under the severely adverse scenario. But Goldman's loss would be a stunning 49.6 percent." [NetNet / John Carney] $$$ Identifying Term Interbank Loans from Fedwire Payments Data [FRBNY] $$$ S&P Ratings Debate Doesn’t Show Fraud, Peterson Says [Bloomberg] $$$ Q. Do you ever throw your weight around during Internet arguments? Like, "I knew you were going to compare me to Hitler because I AM MIKE GODWIN." A. I never do that. [DI]

$$$ Inside a Star Hedge Fund: Lots of Big Bets, Built Fast [WSJ] $$$ Fed pushes banks to ignore rivals when setting bonuses [Reuters] $$$ JPMorgan Board Backs CEO Dimon as Chairman, Pays Zames More [Bloomberg] $$$ The Senate Drafts the SEC's Case Against JPMorgan [BBW] $$$ "A J.P. Morgan Chase employee climbed onstage at a black-tie dinner held on Wall Street Thursday night and accepted an award on behalf of the embattled bank for 'best crisis management.' ... Kathy Hu, an executive director in J.P. Morgan’s investor relations department, accepted the award and quipped: 'Can I just say, "Crisis? What crisis?"' J.P. Morgan beat out nominees Chevron Corp., which struggled with a refinery fire last year, and St. Jude Medical Inc., which battled heart-device problems." [Deal Journal] $$$ Pope calls Argentine kiosk owner to cancel paper delivery [CNA] $$$ Hey, Let Harvard Alumni Have Their Fun This Morning [DI] $$$ Deutsche Bank mulls raising fixed pay to counter EU bonus rules [Reuters] $$$ Judges’ Spat Strikes a Chord Among Deal Makers [DealBook] $$$ "Now some distressed debt investors get to find out what exactly it is you buy when you buy American-issued debt in a company incorporated in the Cayman Islands and doing business in China. I suspect the answer will be 'not much.'" [DealBook] $$$ "Henry Blodget is, in all seriousness, an artist of the internet whose methods should be studied and analyzed for future generations." [Gawker] $$$ "Finally I should note that the rectal gonorrhoea is the reason for my odour." Investment research! [Bronte Capital]

$$$ Banks’ M&A earnings drop to Lehman low [FT] $$$ Spain's crisis budget aims at spending cuts not tax rises [Reuters] $$$ There isn't really a Spanish deposit flight [FTAV] $$$ SEC Charges Investment Bank Analyst with Illegally Tipping College Friend About Nonpublic Merger Deals [SEC] $$$ Lawyer for Ex-Goldman Programmer Criticizes Prosecutors and Firm [DealBook] $$$ "Hedge Fund Pivot Joins BTG to Defy Bacon’s Investment Desert" is a real Bloomberg headline [Bloomberg] $$$ Canada cheese-smuggling ring busted [BBC] $$$ TCW is looking for a credit analyst in LA [DBCC] $$$ RIM's Earnings Beat Expectations; Shares Up 16% [WSJ] $$$ Geithner Urges an Overhaul of Rules on Money Market Funds [DealBook] $$$ SEC’s Gallagher Calls for Floating Price for Money Market Funds [Bloomberg] $$$ Mortgage rates are at all-time lows [CR] $$$ Houses on "Places" cost more than houses on "Streets" [Atlantic Cities] $$$ This happened [Twitter]

$$$ Cliff Asness: The Hidden Tax Behind Wall Street Reform [WSJ] $$$ Banks’ Debt Addiction Said to Face Scrutiny at Basel Group [Bloomberg] $$$ Citigroup Joins Roster of Banks Advising Dell Buyout [Deal Journal] $$$ Bloomberg: still really into the $83bn TBTF subsidy [Bloomberg, earlier, etc.] $$$ Ms. White got a warmer welcome from some members of the panel, which is set to vote on her nomination before it moves to the full Senate. "The more I find out about you, the more I like you," said Sen. Tom Coburn (R., Okla.), adding that he had already decided to support her nomination. Sen. Charles Schumer (D., N.Y.), introducing Ms. White at the beginning of the hearing, described the lighter side of a woman known mostly for locking up terrorists and mobsters. He told the packed hearing room that Ms. White served as chairman of the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, likes to "crack open a cold can of Bud" and was effective on the basketball court as a member of a New York women's basketball league. [WSJ] $$$ A sinkhole swallowed a golfer on the 14th fairway [DM] $$$ A resource focused boutique investment bank is looking for an associate in New York [DBCC] $$$ An Asset Manager’s Guide to Swap Trading in the New Regulatory World [DPW] $$$ SEC asked Goldman to disclose more about illiquid assets - filings [Reuters] $$$ Funds pick Credit Suisse over UBS on revamp risks [Reuters] $$$ "There is nothing funny about these photos, in which Mitt Romney celebrates his 66th birthday by eating fluffernutter cupcakes and wearing a stupid birthday hat." [DI] $$$ 'Wolf of Wall Street' Gets $1M Pay Day for Movie Rights [FBN]

$$$ Santander, BBVA Among Spanish Banks Downgraded By Moody’s [Bloomberg] $$$ Spain denies bank run reports [FT] $$$ Big banks need extra $566bn, says Fitch [FT, FTAV] $$$ Icahn Takeover of CVR Gets Support From 55% of Holders [Bloomberg] $$$ JPMorgan's Dimon says will testify before Congress [Reuters] $$$ Occupy Wall Street is staging an intervention with Jamie Dimon [NC] $$$ BlackRock is looking for a performance analyst in Princeton [DBCC] $$$ At CME, an Uproar Over Trading Hours [WSJ] $$$ SEC Probes Role of Hedge Fund in CDOs [WSJ] $$$ Which Biglaw Firm Accidentally Released Embarrassing, Unredacted Documents About Goldman Sachs? [ATL] $$$ Floyd Norris: "For market makers, who may buy unwanted securities that customers want to sell, hedging may be wise and prudent. But it will also be short term, until the bank trades out of whatever position it took on in the course of making the market. But if banks hedge long-term investments, as JPMorgan evidently did, the hedge is also likely to be long term. It will consist of buying something that, in normal times, should move in the opposite direction of their investment. The result is that they will be making convergence trades that are indistinguishable from what Long Term Capital Management did. Given the size of the big banks, they will have to do so in huge volumes that can come back to haunt them if markets move the wrong way." [NYT] $$$ The Boldface Names on the Witness List for Gupta’s Trial includes Lloyd Blankfein, Gary Cohn, Ken Chenault, Raj Rajaratnam, James Barnacle, and Adam Smith [DealBook]

$$$ J.C. Penney Ousts Ron Johnson, Rehires Myron Ullman [WSJ] $$$ Capital markets: Is Citi the new golden child of Wall Street? [Euromoney] $$$ White Confirmed as SEC Chairman [WSJ] $$$ A.I.G. Seeks to Bar Greenberg From Suing U.S. on Its Behalf [DealBook] $$$ David Stockman's dystopia [Fortune] $$$ Wrestling’s Private Equity Champion [DealBook] $$$ Google Glass Already Being Banned from Strip Clubs [BetaBeat] $$$ The Fine Line Between Political Intelligence and Insider Trading [DealBook] $$$ Hedge Funds Wagering on Fannie Reincarnation [Bloomberg] $$$ As Deadline Looms, Few Companies Sign Up to Trade Swaps [WSJ] $$$ Costs of derivatives clearing stack up for buy-side [Reuters] $$$ Volcker: Central banks are too aggressive [CNN] $$$ Market Crash Likelihood Goes Up If Stocks Continue to Rally: Marc Faber [CNBC] $$$ Science proves women like men with bigger penises [NBC]

$$$ Pierre-Henri Flamand is closing his event-driven hedge fund Edoma because there are no events [WSJ] $$$ Global Regulators to Cut List of Too-Big-To-Fail Banks to 28 [Bloomberg] $$$ Wells Seeks Mortgage-Suit Dismissal, Citing Redundancy [WSJ] $$$ Bloomberg endorses Obama [Bloomberg View] $$$ So does Whitney Tilson [BBW] $$$ Obviously there is a Harvard Business School Gangnam Style video [YouTube] $$$ The SEC is looking for a graphic artist / web designer in DC [DBCC] $$$ "Bernanke Depression Guru Seeks Roosevelt Well-Being" [Bloomberg] $$$ "The guide's popularity offers a glimpse into the world of aspiring management consultants" [WSJ] $$$ "Over the last 60 years, poll questions that asked people which candidate they expected to win have been a better guide to the outcome of the presidential race than questions asking people whom they planned to vote for." [NYT] $$$ Yield is the Last Refuge of Scoundrels [Aleph Blog] $$$ Cory Booker Not Taking Hot Pocket Crisis Seriously [DI]

$$$ The power is back on in parts of downtown [DI] $$$ And it was never off at Goldman [DealBook] $$$ But the marathon is off [NYT, earlier] $$$ Berkshire Profit Climbs 72% on Derivatives, Railroad [Bloomberg] $$$ More Hedge Funds Close Up Shop as Returns Fizzle [Reuters] $$$ Jérôme Kerviel is the most indebted man in the world [Atlantic] $$$ Macquarie is looking for equity research associates in New York, including in the Oil & Gas, Business Services, Utilities, and Transportation & Logistics sectors [DBCC] $$$ SEC Asked Groupon for Financial Disclosures [WSJ] $$$ "The problem is that when you actually look at the documents from some of the troubled investments during the financial crisis, in many cases the disclosure was copious. There were warnings of the risks; investors just failed to heed the warning signs that should have led them to further investigation." [DealBook / Steven Davidoff] $$$ Goldman urges Supreme Court to end mortgage class-action [Reuters] $$$ E*Trade Reviews Practices on 'Best Execution' for Stock Trades [WSJ] $$$ Model Under Fire for Using Sandy Wreckage for Photo Shoot [ABC]