Write-Offs: 02.19.13

$$$ FBI Launches Criminal Inquiry Into Heinz Options Trading [WSJ] $$$ Herbalife Fourth-Quarter Profit Tops Analysts’ Estimates [Bloomberg] $$$ Greenlight shows 'likelihood of success' against Apple -judge [Reuters] $$$ One problem with paying interest on excess reserves is that you pay interest on excess reserves [FT] $$$ Blavatnik hits out at ‘arrogant’ JPMorgan [FT] $$$ "I use psychoanalytic theory to argue that the malevolent object of [Occupy Wall Street's] critique is the father, who, in fulfillment of the paternal function, forces socialization upon us. The world of artificial images is culture, seen from the standpoint of alienation. Their alternative, rooted in their authenticity, with themselves as models, doesn't amount to much." [SSRN via Bainbridge] $$$ "'If you want to protect yourself get a double barrel shotgun, you don't need an AR-15,' Biden said, referring to a type of semi-assault weapon. 'You don't need an AR-15, it's harder to aim, it's harder to use...buy a shotgun. Buy a shotgun.'" [TPM] $$$ A leading hedge fund administrator is seeking a project manager / business analyst [DBCC] $$$ OfficeMax, Office Depot in Talks to Merge [WSJ] $$$ Is Linn Energy ponzi-ish? [Bronte Capital] $$$ Institutional buyers jostle for position in new infrastructure debt market [Euromoney] $$$ Multimillion Diamond Heist at Brussels Airport [WSJ] $$$ A guy wrote a book that, unlike every other book, "paints a picture of a fast-moving, high-stakes, ego-fueled market controlled by a handful of traders. The champagne flowed when profit was strong, he said, but heads rolled over a single miscalculation." [DealBook] $$$ "[W]e are very well-versed in the legend of the power breakfast, but we will enhance it with our own culture ...” [NYP]
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$$$FBI Launches Criminal Inquiry Into Heinz Options Trading [WSJ]

$$$Herbalife Fourth-Quarter Profit Tops Analysts’ Estimates [Bloomberg]

$$$Greenlight shows 'likelihood of success' against Apple -judge [Reuters]

$$$ One problem with paying interest on excess reserves is that you pay interest on excess reserves [FT]

$$$Blavatnik hits out at ‘arrogant’ JPMorgan [FT]

$$$ "I use psychoanalytic theory to argue that the malevolent object of [Occupy Wall Street's] critique is the father, who, in fulfillment of the paternal function, forces socialization upon us. The world of artificial images is culture, seen from the standpoint of alienation. Their alternative, rooted in their authenticity, with themselves as models, doesn't amount to much." [SSRN via Bainbridge]

$$$ "'If you want to protect yourself get a double barrel shotgun, you don't need an AR-15,' Biden said, referring to a type of semi-assault weapon. 'You don't need an AR-15, it's harder to aim, it's harder to use...buy a shotgun. Buy a shotgun.'" [TPM]

$$$ A leading hedge fund administrator is seeking a project manager / business analyst [DBCC]

$$$OfficeMax, Office Depot in Talks to Merge [WSJ]

$$$ Is Linn Energy ponzi-ish? [Bronte Capital]

$$$Institutional buyers jostle for position in new infrastructure debt market [Euromoney]

$$$Multimillion Diamond Heist at Brussels Airport [WSJ]

$$$ A guy wrote a book that, unlike every other book, "paints a picture of a fast-moving, high-stakes, ego-fueled market controlled by a handful of traders. The champagne flowed when profit was strong, he said, but heads rolled over a single miscalculation." [DealBook]

$$$ "[W]e are very well-versed in the legend of the power breakfast, but we will enhance it with our own culture ...” [NYP]

Related

Write-Offs: 05.31.12

$$$ Spain reveals €100bn capital flight [FT] $$$ Spain Says It Has Months to Raise Bank-Bailout Funds [WSJ] $$$ Market Braces for What Could Be Another Weak Jobs Report [CNBC] $$$ Goldman’s Cohn Warns Of Poaching Risks From Further Cuts [Bloomberg] $$$ Larry Fink's hedge-fund-manager son Josh isn't having a great time of it [AR-Alpha] $$$ "T. Boone Pickens, who apparently follows Drake on Twitter, sure isn't [impressed], replying 'The first billion is a helluva lot harder' with a mic-drop retweet." [Gizmodo] $$$ RAND Corporation is looking for a business analyst in Santa Monica [DBCC] $$$ Blankfein Expected to Testify at Gupta Trial [WSJ] $$$ JPMorgan CIO Swaps Pricing Said to Differ From Bank [Bloomberg] $$$ Felix Salmon is in a fight with a startup that has "has the best part of $300,000 in interest-free financing repayable at a time of its choosing in underwear." [Reuters] $$$ "'They signed off on their messages with LOL — laughing out loud,' Police Commissioner Ray Kelly said. 'Well, there was a person who was laughing out loud. That was Police Officer Michael Rodrigues of the 77th Precinct.'" [NYP] $$$ Try "the Douche Burger, a $666 edible fiscal disaster that piles caviar, lobster & truffles on top of a foie-stuffed, gold-leaf-wrapped Kobe patty, smothers it with Gruyere melted with Champagne steam, and finishes it off with BBQ sauce made using Kopi Luwak coffee that's passed through the digestive tract of the Asian Palm Civet, explaining why it 'may not taste good, but will make you feel rich as f*ck.'" [Thrillist via Copyranter]

Write-Offs: 02.22.12

$$$ Schapiro Questions Role of High-Frequency Traders [WSJ] $$$ Morgan Stanley veterans plan advisory boutique Dean Bradley Osborne or DBO Partners [FT] $$$ Charlie Gasparino: Preet Bharara plans to profit from taking credit for insider trading prosecutions [FBN] $$$ New York Federal Reserve Said to Plan Sale of AIG-Linked Mortgage Bonds [Bloomberg] $$$ UWS lawyer's wife paid $42,388 so husband could meet Knicks' Lin, take home jersey [NYP] $$$ A leading private equity firm is looking for an Energy associate [eFinancial Careers]

Write-Offs: 12.04.12

$$$ U.S. Banks See Strong Profit [WSJ] $$$ U.S. court says Argentina does not need to make $250 mln deposit [Reuters] $$$ Former Goldman Director Gupta to Stay Free Pending His Appeal [DealBook] $$$ Banks book record profits off Fannie and Freddie [Term Sheet, related] $$$ "The online brokerage of Bank of America Merrill Lynch rolled out something it is calling Face Retirement. ... Here’s how it works: It’s a website that takes your current image, using a web cam, and makes you old and decrepit — the kind of person who will need some cash socked away." [Deal Journal] $$$ "Prosecutors said there is no such thing as a $500 million Federal Reserve note" [UPI] $$$ The CME is looking for an executive director for equity index products [DBCC] $$$ Corporate bond "turnover has not collapsed 80 percent in the same way as dealer inventory, and in fact daily volumes are on a par with where they were in 2007." [Bond Vigilantes] $$$ CME Deliverable ‘Swap Futures’ See Comfortable Debut [MarketBeat] $$$ High Rollers Are Still Big Losers 18 Months After Online Poker's "Black Friday" [BuzzFeed, also MR: "Even if some of these sites were fraudulent, one wonders if the players would not have better off without government 'protection.'"] $$$ The "gentleman groper" is a lawyer, not a banker [ATL, earlier] $$$ "Can a dog be trained to drive a car? New Zealand's Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals proved it could be done." [CBS, video!!!]

Write-Offs: 08.14.12

$$$ Euro Zone Economy Shrinks, Darkening Outlook [WSJ] $$$ Greece seeks two-year austerity extension [FT] $$$ Knight Upgrade Triggered Old Trading System, Big Losses [WSJ] $$$ Goldman executives win dismissal of mortgage, TARP lawsuit [Reuters] $$$ Reservoir poised to seed ex-Goldman trader Buck Ratchford with $200M+ [AR-Alpha, related] $$$ You should really be drinking more at work [Economist] $$$ United Airlines Lost My Friend's 10 Year Old Daughter And Didn't Care [Bob Sutton] $$$ A Chicago hedge fund is looking for a senior quantitative strategist to develop commodity futures high frequency trading strategies [DBCC] $$$ In Ski-Resort Bankruptcy, FDIC Tries Role of Lender [WSJ] $$$ Steve Cohen, George Soros Purchased Facebook Shares [Deal Journal] $$$ Rakoff better able to review SEC-Citigroup pact [Reuters] $$$ BATS Proposes Plan to Offer Discounts on Retail Orders [Reuters] $$$ Biden Says Romney Would Put Middle Class ‘Back In Chains’ [Bloomberg] $$$ The head of Hungary's far-right anti-Semitic party found out he's Jewish [AP]

Write-Offs: 07.03.12

$$$ David Einhorn is at the final table of the $1mm buy-in no-limit hold-em event at the World Series of Poker [ESPN] $$$ Police search Sarkozy home and offices [FT] $$$ JPMorgan’s Role in Power Market Comes Under Scrutiny [DealBook] $$$ Fink Says Diamond ‘Emotion’ May Have Aggravated Regulator [Bloomberg] $$$ The culture of CEO-punching runs deep at BarcLeh [NetNet / John Carney] $$$ That’s it for us today. Enjoy the 4th and we'll see you on Thursday. $$$ A $10 billion NY-based asset manager is looking for an ADR arbitrage trader - interested? [DBCC] $$$ Welcome back Ireland! [FTAV] $$$ SEC Loses Bid to Get SIPC to Pay Stanford Ponzi Claims [WSJ] $$$ In Maine, lobster that is cheaper than bologna [MSNBC] $$$ Tom Cruise prevented a Dawson's Creek reunion [NYP]

Write-Offs: 04.27.12

$$$ Spain's Unemployment Jumps, Deepening Crisis [WSJ] $$$ "... the McClendon-[X] deal raises a number of concerns, some analysts said," for any X [Reuters, earlier] $$$ "Being violation-free alone does not guarantee that a public company or registered entity will not face the wrath of the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission Division of Enforcement, its director, Robert Khuzami, told Thomson Reuters Tuesday." Good to keep 'em guessing. [Reuters] $$$ How to Leak to Gawker Without (Hopefully) Getting Caught, usefulness not limited to Gawker [Gawker] $$$ Who Was the Third Person in Bret Easton Ellis and Rielle Hunter’s (Aborted) Cocaine-Induced Threesome? [NYO] $$$ BNP Paribas would like to find an emerging markets equities analyst for its Boston office, if you know anyone [DBCC] $$$ Forget Bailouts, European Banks Needs Bail-Ins: Fitch [CNBC] $$$ After Quiet Years, British Regulator Gets Tough on Abuses [DealBook] $$$ Lazard profit drops on costs, but still beats Street [Reuters] $$$ Kyle Bass' Japan short gets the B-school case study treatment [AR-Alpha] $$$ Banks to Meet With Fed on Derivatives Rule [WSJ] $$$ Paul Ryan Suddenly Decides He Hates Ayn Rand [DI]

Write-Offs: 08.31.12

$$$ "Bernanke Signals Readiness to Do More" [WSJ] $$$ "Judgment Days Arrive for Euro Crisis" [WSJ] $$$ Spain To Recapitalize Bankia After 4.45 Billion-Euro Loss [Bloomberg] $$$ Nomura’s Failed Global Ambitions [DealBook] $$$ Quebec Whodunit: 1/4 of Province’s Syrup Reserves Go Missing [WSJ] $$$ That’s it for us today. We’re off Monday for the holiday, enjoy the long weekend and see you on Tuesday! $$$ A global investment bank is looking for an experienced metals options trader in New York [DBCC] $$$ Facebook hits new low after price target cuts [Reuters] $$$ Here is some hedge fund Weltschmerz [FT] $$$ Here is a really depressing story about student loans [NYT] $$$ Some people still don't like PowerPoint [BBW] $$$ "In general, rabbits preferred the higher resolution of the MacBook, whereas squirrels favored the larger screen of the Toshiba. Chipmunks were too hyperactive to linger around either device, even though I sprinkled the keyboards liberally with birdseed, which chipmunks seem to enjoy far more than birds do. I do not recommend this practice ..." [NYT]

Write-Offs: 04.09.12

$$$ Facebook to Buy Instagram For $1 Billion [WSJ] $$$ "[R]ight before its billion dollar acquisition from Facebook, Instagram closed a $50 million Series B round from Sequoia, Josh Kushner’s Thrive Capital, Greylock and Benchmark at a $500 million valuation. ... Investors, many of whom didn’t know about the Facebook acquisition, literally doubled their money (which was wired to Instagram last Thursday) overnight." [TC] $$$ Feds aim to sack former Bears QB Jim McMahon over bad bank loans [Chicago Sun-Times] $$$ "JOBS Act won't mean mass marketing for hedge funds." Just a few discreet ads on Dealbreaker. [AR-Alpha] $$$ John Mack: “You have to do what makes you passionate and turns you on. And this really turns me on.” "Selling women's shoes? [NYM] $$$ Are you in business school and looking for a job? T. Rowe Price is looking for an MBA intern in its global investment services division [DBCC] $$$ What if the Sky Fell? [Bloomberg TV] $$$ Banks test ‘CDOs’ for trade finance [FT] $$$ Bank of America, Barclays Deny Illegal Acts Over Archstone [Bloomberg] $$$ William Cohan thinks that an FDA for financial products is a silly idea; update your priors [Bloomberg, earlier] $$$ ‘The Unchosen Ones,’ a proposed reality TV series, focuses on former Hasidic Jews [NYDN] $$$ The Jennifer Love Hewitt Handjob Hour Is The Funniest New Show On TV [Gawker]