Skip to main content

SAC Capital Is One False Move Away From Needing Signed Hall Passes From Preet Bharara To Use The Bathroom

  • Author:
  • Updated:

They can trade without his permission for now but one slip up-- just one!-- and it'll be "Please Mr. Bharara, can I please buy shares of [company that will make a major announcement in the morning]," "Oh thank Mr. Bharara, good day Mr. Bharara."

The U.S. government plans to negotiate an agreement to allow SAC Capital Advisors LP to continue its operations even as it faces criminal insider-trading charges and an effort by prosecutors to seize most of its assets, according to a law-enforcement official. No agreement is in place and no terms have been set, the official said. The official added that if prosecutors felt the firm engaged in any further improper behavior, they could "ratchet up" the terms of any agreement and make them more restrictive, including requiring that SAC seek advance approval of significant transactions, the official said.

Obviously "improper behavior" leaves things nice and intentionally vague/broad, so as to potentially include infractions like leaving dishes in the sink, using foul language in IMs, and whistling while you work. Everybody had better check themselves.

SAC Operating Plan To Be Negotiated [WSJ]


Preet Bharara: University Of Michigan Doctor Financially Compensated For Leaking Confidential Drug Trial Data To Former SAC Trader Just An Innocent Pawn In Big Bad Hedge Fund's Game

As you may have heard, earlier today, Mathew Martoma, a former portfolio manager in SAC Capital's CR Intrinsic unit, was charged with allegedly running “the most lucrative insider trading scheme ever," netting $276 million for the fund. He did so based on information that was given to him by Sid Gilman, a University of Michigan neurologist and chair of a "safety-monitoring committee that oversaw a clinical trial by Wyeth LLC and Elan Corp.  into whether the drug bapineuzumab, or bapi, was safe for patients with mild-to-moderate Alzheimer’s disease." Over an 18-month period, Gilman and Martoma met 42 times, in addition to emailing and chatting over the phone. For example:

If You Need Preet Bharara, He'll Be In His Office Screaming Into A Pillow

It's like the Supreme Court is trying to hurt him/discredit his life's work.